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Your friend has decided to switch careers, but isn’t sure which to choose. What advice would you give them? Provide reasons and examples to support your response. v.1

Your friend has decided to switch careers, but isn’t sure which to choose. What advice would you give them? Provide reasons and examples to support your response. v. 1
When children are young, they asked by adults what they want to be when they grow up. This unfortunately, causes kids to think that they can only have one job for the rest of their life. But, in reality, it is perfectly normal for people to want a change. If my friend was thinking about switching her career, but she didn’t know what she wanted to do, I would give her the following two pieces of advice. First, if my friend was considering changing her job, I would suggest that she go back to the drawing board. The best career path is one that encompasses three values, each of which everyone gives different weight. The work must allow her to make enough money to live comfortably, it must be something that she is good at, and it must be something that she finds rewarding. For instance, when I was a lawyer, I was good at my job and I earned plenty of money, but I was not proud of the work I was doing. I decided to leave the legal field behind and pursued a job that I could actually enjoy while helping people. That is when I decided to become a teacher instead. In order to determine which new career will be best for her, my friend will need to do some soul-searching first and then look for a job that will include these three ideals. Next, if my friend wasn’t sure which new career to choose, but she had a few in mind, I would advise her to job shadow them. As they say, it is best to check the temperature of the water before diving in head first. This happened to my aunt when she wanted to quit her job and become a policewoman. Before signing up at the police academy, she job-shadowed. She sat in on some of the classes first, to see if she was interested. She interviewed police officers, to find out if the job would be what she expected, and she rode along with them while they were on duty, to learn what it would be like. Ultimately, she discovered that being a policewoman was not the right fit for her. It was better that she job-shadowed first before making the commitment. This is what I would advise my friend to do too. In summary, if my friend was thinking about leaving her career, but didn’t know which one to choose, I would first recommend to her to search for work that best fit her values. Then, I would suggest that she job-shadows any potential jobs she is considering before she makes her choice.
When children are young, they asked by adults what they want to be when they grow up. This unfortunately, causes kids to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for the rest of their life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, in reality, it is
perfectly
normal for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to want a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. If my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
was thinking about switching her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
she didn’t know what she wanted to do, I would give her the following two pieces of advice.

First
, if my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
was considering changing her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, I would suggest that she go back to the drawing board. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
path is one that encompasses three values, each of which everyone gives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
weight. The work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
her to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
comfortably
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be something that she is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at, and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be something that she finds rewarding.
For instance
, when I was a lawyer, I was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and I earned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of money,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I was not proud of the work I was doing. I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the legal field behind and pursued a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that I could actually enjoy while helping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
That is
when I decided to become a teacher
instead
. In order to determine which new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
for her, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
will need to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
soul-searching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
and then look for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that will include these three ideals.

Next
, if my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
wasn’t sure which new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
to choose,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
she had a few in mind, I would advise her to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
shadow them. As they say, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
the temperature of the water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
diving in head
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
. This happened to my aunt when she wanted to quit her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and become a policewoman.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Before
signing up at the police academy, she job-shadowed. She sat in on
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
classes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
if she
was interested
. She interviewed police officers, to find out if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
would be what she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
, and she rode along with them while they were on duty, to learn what it would be like.
Ultimately
, she discovered that being a policewoman was not the right fit for her. It was better that she job-shadowed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
making the commitment. This is what I would advise my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
to do too.

In summary, if my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
was thinking about leaving her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
didn’t know which one to choose, I would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
first
recommend to her to search for work that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
fit her values. Then, I would suggest that she job-shadows any potential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
she is considering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
her choice.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Your friend has decided to switch careers, but isn’t sure which to choose. What advice would you give them? Provide reasons and examples to support your response. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
441 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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