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Your company has decided to organise a training course for the employees at a local Convention centre. They have asked you to contact the manager of the local Convention CentreWrite a letter to the manager of local to national Centre-explain the trailer f v.1

Your company has decided to organise a training course for the employees at a local Convention centre. They have asked you to contact the manager of the local Convention CentreWrite a letter to the manager of local to national Centre-explain the trailer f v. 1
Even though sports activities are viewed by an enormous proportion of the crowd, the amount of pay given for excellent athletes is being debated by various groups of the society. A part of the population believes that it is applicable to allocate an ample amount of money for outstanding sportsmen. Whereas, the rest of the community does not support this argument. On the one hand, it is inevitable that the career of a sports participant is limited to an average period of 15-20 years. Moreover, they are at a higher risk of losing their professions as they have to maintain their performance level up to the standard or else the higher competition level would lead to others replacing their positions. For example, a famous cricket player in the Indian cricket team Rishab pant was promoted to a higher position, but due to his poor output level, his career is in a critical position now. In addition, the economical investments in these activities are tremendous as companies from various parts of the world would pay a plethora of money to promote their products. Therefore, it is reasonable to pay these sports individuals with a significant amount. In contrast, the percentage they contribute to the well-being of the community is far less when compared to other professions like health care, education and environmental development. For instance, the financial benefits gained by a sports person is mostly not utilized for the development of the society, but individuals like doctors and teachers play an important role in saving lives and in educating today’s youth. Moreover, primary working sectors like farming and fishing involves huge workforce and energy, but the financial benefits gained by these workers are significantly lower when compared with successful athletes. In conclusion, even though sports persons have a limited time span and have risks in their career, it is vital to pay other sectors with more money as it will help to develop both the environment and the residents of the nation.
Even though
sports
activities
are viewed
by an enormous proportion of the crowd, the amount of
pay
given
for excellent athletes is
being debated
by various groups of the society. A part of the population believes that it is applicable to allocate an ample amount of money for outstanding sportsmen.
Whereas
, the rest of the community does not support this argument.

On the one hand, it is inevitable that the career of a
sports
participant
is limited
to an average period of 15-20 years.
Moreover
, they are at a higher
risk
of losing their professions as they
have to
maintain their performance level up to the standard or else the higher competition level would lead to others replacing their positions.
For example
, a
famous
cricket player in the Indian cricket team
Rishab
pant
was promoted
to a higher position,
but
due to his poor output level, his career is in a critical position
now
.
In addition
, the economical investments in these activities are tremendous as
companies
from various parts of the world would
pay
a plethora of money to promote their products.
Therefore
, it is reasonable to
pay
these
sports
individuals with a significant amount.

In contrast
, the percentage they contribute to the well-being of the community is far less when compared to other professions like health care, education and environmental development.
For instance
, the financial benefits gained by a
sports
person is
mostly
not utilized for the development of the society,
but
individuals like doctors and teachers play an
important
role in saving
lives
and in educating
today
’s youth.
Moreover
, primary working sectors like farming and fishing involves huge workforce and energy,
but
the financial benefits gained by these workers are
significantly
lower when compared with successful athletes.

In conclusion
,
even though
sports
persons have a limited time span and have
risks
in their career, it is vital to
pay
other sectors with more money as it will
help
to develop both the environment and the residents of the nation.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Your company has decided to organise a training course for the employees at a local Convention centre. They have asked you to contact the manager of the local Convention CentreWrite a letter to the manager of local to national Centre-explain the trailer f v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
331 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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