Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Student Saini universities open have it was two places to live they may choose to live a University dominators they may choose to live in apartment in the community compare the advantages of living in universities housing with the advent of living in an a v.1

Student Saini universities open have it was two places to live they may choose to live a University dominators they may choose to live in apartment in the community compare the advantages of living in universities housing with the advent of living in an a v. 1
In the modern era, where everyone wants to lead a luxurious life, avail the opportunities to migrate into other countries and ready to work in those positions which domestic workers unwilling to do. From my perspective, I partially agree with this statement that it causes problems in local society. To begin with, nowadays, due to the increasing rate of unemployment, folks migrate to other countries in search of a job for a better life and are open to do any kind of work they get for their survival in that area, but domestic people who belongs to that region are not ready to do the low level kind of works like cleaning, loading and so on and thus, creates a problem for the local folks to accept them as a member of their society and feeling of racial discrimination arises, which is not good for the prosperity of that particular nation. For instance, according to the recent survey it has been observed that the cases of racial discrimination are at the highest peak in the USA and other developed countries. On the other hand, it is logical that every person wants its business to be well established and for that they need workers, but if domestic workers of that area are ready for the work, then they should not bring the workers from other countries as it creates unemployment among local people and promotes racism against them which is not good for nation social fabric. To illustrate, in the recent survey in California, it has been discovered that there has been an increase in the number of racism cases against folks from other nations To conclude, although, it cannot be denied that foreign companies employ people from other countries to increase their profit, but at the same time they have to create employment for local folks as well.
In the modern era, where everyone wants to lead a luxurious life, avail the opportunities to migrate into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and ready to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in those positions which domestic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
unwilling to do. From my perspective, I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement that it causes problems in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
society.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, nowadays, due to the increasing rate of unemployment, folks migrate to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in search of a job for a better life and are open to do any kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
for their survival in that area,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
domestic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
Did you mean "belong"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
belongs
to that region are not ready to do the low level kind of works like cleaning, loading and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on and
thus
, creates a problem for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
folks to accept them as a member of their society and feeling of racial discrimination arises, which is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the prosperity of that particular nation.
For instance
, according to the recent survey it has
been observed
that the cases of racial discrimination are at the highest peak in the USA and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it is logical that every person wants its business to be well established and for that they need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if domestic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
of that area are ready for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, then they should not bring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
as it creates unemployment among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and promotes racism against them which is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for nation social fabric. To illustrate, in the recent survey in California, it has
been discovered
that there has been an increase in the number of racism cases against folks from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
nations


To conclude
, although, it cannot
be denied
that foreign
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
employ
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to increase their profit,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
at the same time they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
create employment for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
folks
as well
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
One who speaks only one language is one person, but one who speaks two languages is two people.
Turkish proverb

IELTS essay Student Saini universities open have it was two places to live they may choose to live a University dominators they may choose to live in apartment in the community compare the advantages of living in universities housing with the advent of living in an a v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts