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You stayed with your friend and by mistake carried home one Of his objects. Write a letter and explain-how are you enjoyed staying with your friend. -Explain the object which you brought with you by mistake and explain how much stake happened -mention how v.1

You stayed with your friend and by mistake carried home one Of his objects. Write a letter and explain-how are you enjoyed staying with your friend. -Explain the object which you brought with you by mistake and explain how much stake happened -mention how v. 1
Some people believe that the importance of the local or national history outweighs the importance of the world history. They opine that there are no benefits of understanding and learning the world history. I disagree with their points of view for some good reasons, as described below. On the one hand, I second the outlook that schoolchildren ought to familiarize themselves with the local history. At the onset, it offers them a sense of belonging and pride when they learn about their history. Most countries had gone through a bloodbath for their freedom. They will know about invaluable sacrifices that their ancestors made for the freedom, Secondly, which is more important, they will learn about the origin and core values of their motherland. By this way, they will be able to carry forward their customs to the next generation with a story to tell always. On the other hand, knowing about the world history has its own distinctive merits. In this globalized world, interdependence of trade has made people travel the world. These young children surely reap benefits when they are grown up and mobile for any purpose. Armed with the broader prospective, they are able to integrate into the local culture of other countries. This bank of knowledge helps them to know about the past developments and the origins of people across the globe. In conclusion, I support the notion of learning the history of the nation and world for young children as it makes sense and serves the purpose.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the importance of the local or national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
outweighs the importance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. They opine that there are no benefits of understanding and learning the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. I disagree with their points of view for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reasons, as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
below.

On the one hand, I second the outlook that schoolchildren ought to familiarize themselves with the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. At the onset, it offers them a sense of belonging and pride when they learn about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. Most countries had gone through a bloodbath for their freedom. They will know about invaluable sacrifices that their ancestors made for the freedom,
Secondly
, which is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, they will learn about the origin and core values of their motherland. By this way, they will be able to carry forward their customs to the
next
generation with a story to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
always.

On the other hand
, knowing about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
distinctive merits. In this globalized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, interdependence of trade has made
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
travel the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
. These young children
surely
reap benefits when they
are grown
up and mobile for any purpose. Armed with the broader prospective, they are able to integrate into the local culture of other countries. This bank of knowledge
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to know about the past developments and the origins of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
across the globe.

In conclusion
, I support the notion of learning the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of the nation and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
for young children as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
sense and serves the purpose.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay You stayed with your friend and by mistake carried home one Of his objects. Write a letter and explain-how are you enjoyed staying with your friend. -Explain the object which you brought with you by mistake and explain how much stake happened -mention how v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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