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You have unexpectedly come into a large sum of money and you want to share this good newswith your friend. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter● explain where the money came from● say what you intend to do with the money● invite your friend v.1

You have unexpectedly come into a large sum of money and you want to share this good newswith your friend. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter● explain where the money came from● say what you intend to do with the money● invite your friend v. 1
In this era, knowledge about natural habitats is sadly not widely known. The reasons for this may be numerous; however, there are a few main causes for which solutions can be suggested. The two chief sources of this trend are poor education and the lack of social campaigns. First and foremost, it is likely that people possess little knowledge about the natural world since they are insufficiently taught about this topic in schools. Indeed, most academic programs in many countries only focus on theory instead of providing students with practice. For instance, children are not able to learn about how ecosystems work without truly witnessing that with their own eyes. This leads to the fact that lessons about nature are easily forgotten and diluted. Secondly, this tendency may be the result of the lack of social campaigns. Specifically, these campaigns would be able to educate a great number of citizens about nature with the support of media development. However, they do not receive sufficient investments, which results in the fact that there are few contents shown to the public with little quality. As a consequence, a few steps can be taken to tackle this problem. Firstly, academic programs should be redesigned with more practical contents. For example, there could be more extracurricular activities for students to obtain some actual experience by visiting nature conservation areas or zoos. Besides, the government should consider investing greater financial resources in making social campaigns about the natural world. In particular, the content should be interesting enough to capture public attention, imprint the relevant knowledge in their minds, and compete with commercials in terms of on-air time. In general, the shortage of practical contents in schools and the low number of social campaigns are the two major causes, and making positive adjustments to education and governmental funding are two possible solutions to this issue.
In this era, knowledge about natural habitats is
sadly
not
widely
known. The reasons for this may be numerous;
however
, there are a few main causes for which solutions can
be suggested
.

The two chief sources of this trend are poor education and the lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campaigns
.
First
and foremost, it is likely that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
possess
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
knowledge about the natural world since they are
insufficiently
taught about this topic in schools.
Indeed
, most academic programs in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focus on theory
instead
of providing students with practice.
For instance
, children are not able to learn about how ecosystems work without
truly
witnessing that with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
eyes. This leads to the fact that lessons about nature are
easily
forgotten and diluted.
Secondly
, this tendency may be the result of the lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campaigns
.
Specifically
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campaigns
would be able to educate a great number of citizens about nature with the support of media development.
However
, they do not receive sufficient investments, which results in the fact that there are few contents shown to the public with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
quality.

As a consequence, a few steps can
be taken
to tackle this problem.
Firstly
, academic programs should
be redesigned
with more practical contents.
For example
, there could be more extracurricular activities for students to obtain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
actual experience by visiting nature conservation areas or zoos.
Besides
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should consider investing greater financial resources in making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campaigns
about the natural world.
In particular
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
content
should be interesting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to capture public attention, imprint the relevant knowledge in their minds, and compete with commercials in terms of on-air time.

In general
, the shortage of practical contents in schools and the low number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campaigns
are the two major causes, and making
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
adjustments to education and governmental funding are two possible solutions to this issue.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay You have unexpectedly come into a large sum of money and you want to share this good newswith your friend. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter● explain where the money came from● say what you intend to do with the money● invite your friend v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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