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You have recently visited a museum. Now write a letter to your friend about the museum you have visited. Write a letter to him/ her. In your letter, write: - where you went - what you saw there - how you felt about it v.1

You have recently visited a museum. Now write a letter to your friend about the museum you have visited. Write a letter to him/ her. In your letter, write: - where you went - what you saw there - how you felt about it v. 1
Television, also known as the idiot box, is the most popular medium of entertainment. In most of the countries, programmes from other countries is being shown. The dominance of such shows is damaging the cultures of the countries. I partially support the view as these shows are becoming trendy which is vital in shaping the mindset of current youth, which could be dangerous for the culture, but most people from older generations are mature enough to prevent any harm to the local culture and this essay will discuss the same. With the increasing popularity of foreign shows, there has been a kind of pressure on the directors of these serials to show more realistic and better entertainment. To achieve this, they try to display much more violence and intimate scenes. Youth watches these series or daily soaps and try to follow the actors/actresses footprints. This eventually starts a trend to binge on these types of show. For instance, there is a huge fan following for a show named "Money Heist". Although some parts of the society may accept this but there would be a strong opposition by elderly generation. This may be fine in the country where the show is being created, but in broadcasting country, it could be too much. The domestic audience may consider it vulgar and obscene. It may lead to the demolition of local culture and ethics. More mature generation will oppose these type of shows and advice their younger ones not to follow such mentality. To conclude, in my opinion, though the newly trending shows may be more common in younger generations tampering their mindset a bit, but elder people will try to make sure this does bit have any effects on their culture.
Television,
also
known as the idiot box, is the most popular medium of entertainment. In most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is
being shown
. The dominance of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
is damaging the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. I
partially
support the view as these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
are becoming trendy which is vital in shaping the mindset of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
youth, which could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from older generations are mature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
any harm to the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and this essay will discuss the same.

With the increasing popularity of foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
, there has been a kind of pressure on the directors of these serials to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
more realistic and better entertainment. To achieve this, they try to display much more violence and intimate scenes. Youth
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watches
these series or daily soaps and try to follow the actors/actresses footprints. This
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
a trend to binge on these types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
.
For instance
, there is a huge fan following for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
named
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Money Heist
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parts of the society may accept this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there would be a strong opposition by elderly generation.

This may be fine in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
is
being created
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in broadcasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, it could be too much. The domestic audience may consider it vulgar and obscene. It may lead to the demolition of local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and ethics. More mature generation will oppose these type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
and advice their younger ones not to follow such mentality.

To conclude
, in my opinion, though the
newly
trending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
may be more common in younger generations tampering their mindset a bit,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
elder
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure this does bit have any effects on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay You have recently visited a museum. Now write a letter to your friend about the museum you have visited. Write a letter to him/ her. In your letter, write: - where you went - what you saw there - how you felt about it v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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