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You have recently moved to a different house. Write a letter to an English-speaking friend. In your letter• Explain why you have moved• Describe the new house• Invite your friend to come and visit v.1

You have recently moved to a different house. Write a letter to an English-speaking friend. In your letter• Explain why you have moved• Describe the new house• Invite your friend to come and visit v. 1
Nowadays, shopping has become a favourite hobby among youngsters. This is mainly due to the availability of marketing platforms and globalisation. Shopping as a hobby has become the latest trend among young people. One of the main reasons for this is the excessive use of marketing techniques. This means, companies are using advertisements to attract customers through various means like television, window displays and social media. For instance, the shops in malls use creative ways to decorate items or mannequins on display, which urge youngsters to purchase. Companies also use the internet to flash their products on pop-up windows, on computer screens. Globalisation is another reason why shopping has become a time-pass among current generation. This means the availability of cheap transport has made it possible for products to be marketed easily. Hence, goods from any country can be ordered online. Although shopping is fun, an excess can cause an addiction among youngsters, and drain their income. Instead, I feel that young people should be encouraged to do alternate activities in their free time. Rather than purchasing unnecessary items, their money can be used for other useful purposes such as learning to play an instrument, doing outdoor activities and going on vacations. By doing this, they get an opportunity to learn new things while having fun at the same time. For instance, a survey conducted by a vocational college showed that the majority of the students had saved money, to enroll for courses, by reducing their shopping expenses. In conclusion, shopping has become a common hobby among young people because of excessive marketing by companies and globalisation. However, youngsters can be encouraged to try alternate hobbies, such as learning music and visiting places, so that they are exposed to new ideas and things.
Nowadays,
shopping
has
become
a
favourite
hobby
among youngsters. This is
mainly
due to the availability of marketing platforms and
globalisation
.

Shopping as a
hobby
has
become
the latest trend among young
people
. One of the main reasons for this is the excessive
use
of marketing techniques. This means,
companies
are using advertisements to attract customers through various means like television, window displays and social media.
For instance
, the shops in malls
use
creative ways to decorate items or mannequins on display, which urge youngsters to
purchase
.
Companies
also
use
the internet to flash their products on pop-up windows, on computer screens.
Globalisation
is another reason why
shopping
has
become
a time-pass among
current
generation. This means the availability of
cheap
transport has made it possible for products to
be marketed
easily
.
Hence
,
goods
from any country can
be ordered
online.

Although
shopping
is fun, an excess can cause an addiction among youngsters, and drain their income.
Instead
, I feel that young
people
should
be encouraged
to do alternate activities in their free time.
Rather
than purchasing unnecessary items, their money can be
used
for other useful purposes such as learning to play an instrument, doing outdoor activities and going on vacations. By doing this, they
get
an opportunity to learn new things while having fun at the same time.
For instance
, a survey conducted by a vocational college
showed
that the majority of the students had saved money, to enroll for courses, by reducing their
shopping
expenses.

In conclusion
,
shopping
has
become
a common
hobby
among young
people
because
of excessive marketing by
companies
and
globalisation
.
However
, youngsters can
be encouraged
to try alternate
hobbies
, such as learning music and visiting places,
so
that they
are exposed
to new
ideas
and things.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay You have recently moved to a different house. Write a letter to an English-speaking friend. In your letter• Explain why you have moved• Describe the new house• Invite your friend to come and visit v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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