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You are attending a night course in the school. you are not happy with some parts of the course. Write a letter to the school director about this. In your letter, you should tell: • what course you are studying • what things you are not happy abo v.1

You are attending a night course in the school. you are not happy with some parts of the course. Write a letter to the school director about this. In your letter, you should tell: • what course you are studying • what things you are not happy abo v. 1
On the one hand, there is no doubt that a magnificent outer space can bring about many prestigious commercial value. For symbol, with shopping centres or apartments for rent, it is the outward Presentation that attracts the customers’ attention. A person who gets a positive early impression with the exterior is more likely to enter the building to ask for services. Therefore, the outlook of the constructions is always regarded as an effective advertising tool that brings considerable revenues for their owners. In addition, some buildings symbolizing the history of the city they are located in also need to be beautiful from the outside. Take Hanoi Opera House as a case, it has long been considered a Vietnamese cultural site, so maintaining its attractive exterior is undoubtedly an essential task. On the other hand, the function is also of significances to a building. The early reason is that every construction needs to be safe and comfortable. For instance, a shopping mall has to possess a wide walkway, a good lighting organization, and adequate emergency exits. Furthermore, each building has its own, practical use, so architects have to picture it with a view to satisfying the requirements of the building’s users. A theatre, for case, is supposed to have a well- designed sound system and a scientifically-arranged hall so that everyone in the audience can conveniently enjoy movies or shows. Although both factors are important, I accept that without a proper function-based picture, the gorgeous appearance of a building is only a waste of investment. For pattern, with shopping centres or apartments for rent, it is the outward Appearance that attracts the customers’ attention. A person who gets a positive first impression with the exterior is more likely to enter the building to ask for services. Therefore, the outlook of the constructions is always regarded as an effective advertising tool that brings considerable revenues for their owners. In addition, some buildings symbolizing the history of the city they are located in also need to be beautiful from the outside. Take Hanoi Opera House as an example, it has long been considered a Vietnamese cultural site, so maintaining its attractive exterior is undoubtedly an essential task. On the other hand, the function is also of significances to a building. The first reason is that every construction needs to be safe and comfortable. For instance, a shopping mall has to possess a wide walkway, a good lighting system, and adequate emergency exits. Furthermore, each building has its own, practical use, so architects have to plan it with a view to satisfying the requirements of the building’s users. A theatre, for object, is supposed to have a well- designed sound system and a scientifically-arranged hall so that everyone in the audience can conveniently enjoy movies or shows. Although both factors are important, I accept that without a proper function-based plan, the gorgeous appearance of a building is only a waste of investment.
On the one hand, there is no doubt that a magnificent outer space can bring about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
prestigious commercial value. For symbol, with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
or apartments for rent, it is the outward

Presentation that attracts the customers’ attention. A person who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
early impression with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exterior
is more likely to enter the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
services.
Therefore
, the outlook of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
constructions
is always regarded as an effective advertising tool that brings considerable revenues for their owners.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
symbolizing the history of the city they
are located
in
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
from the outside. Take Hanoi Opera
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
House
as a case, it has long
been considered
a Vietnamese cultural site,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
maintaining its attractive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exterior
is
undoubtedly
an essential task.

On the other hand
, the function is
also
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
significances
to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
. The early reason is that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to be safe and comfortable.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
mall
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
possess a wide walkway, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
lighting organization, and adequate emergency exits.
Furthermore
, each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
, practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
architects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
picture it with a view to satisfying the requirements of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building’s
users. A
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
, for case,
is supposed
to have a well- designed sound system and a
scientifically
-arranged hall
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that everyone in the audience can
conveniently
enjoy movies or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
.

Although both factors are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, I accept that without a proper function-based picture, the gorgeous appearance of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a waste of investment. For pattern, with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
or apartments for rent, it is the outward

Appearance that attracts the customers’ attention. A person who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
first
impression with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exterior
is more likely to enter the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
services.
Therefore
, the outlook of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
constructions
is always regarded as an effective advertising tool that brings considerable revenues for their owners.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
symbolizing the history of the city they
are located
in
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
from the outside. Take Hanoi Opera
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
House
as an example, it has long
been considered
a Vietnamese cultural site,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
maintaining its attractive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exterior
is
undoubtedly
an essential task.

On the other hand
, the function is
also
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
significances
to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
. The
first
reason is that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to be safe and comfortable.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
mall
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
possess a wide walkway, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
lighting system, and adequate emergency exits.
Furthermore
, each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
, practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
architects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
plan it with a view to satisfying the requirements of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building’s
users. A
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
, for object,
is supposed
to have a well- designed sound system and a
scientifically
-arranged hall
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that everyone in the audience can
conveniently
enjoy movies or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
.

Although both factors are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, I accept that without a proper function-based plan, the gorgeous appearance of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a waste of investment.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS essay You are attending a night course in the school. you are not happy with some parts of the course. Write a letter to the school director about this. In your letter, you should tell: • what course you are studying • what things you are not happy abo v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
488 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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