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write to your friend about your favourite movieWrite at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. v.1

write to your friend about your favourite movie You do NOT need to write any addresses. v. 1
Technological advancements in this contemporary era have made citizens more socialized. The majority of the society members agree with this, and the rest disagrees. I strongly admit with the agreed statement. This essay will provide an insight on both the views and relevant examples to support the opinion. On the positive side, Thanks to the internet, which has made the world a small global village, where people across the countries are connected through a world wide web network. For instance, people across the globe are able to connect with their loved ones through social networking sites like Skype, Whatsapp & Facebook with minimal cost and effort. Secondly, Globalization has reduced the travelling costs, in such a way that people are able to cross the continents and nations using flights and bullet trains. Last but not least, online apps have brought more social awareness like ordering clothes and food on the fingertips. On the flip side of this, the technology made the people less social in some aspects. Because of the social media, in person interactions has fallen down drastically. The social bonding and networking that is being achieved when person meets the other person is so strong that the technology will not be able to achieve it. For instance, when two people want to start a business or relationship, in person meeting brings in extra confidence to close the deal. To summarize, technology enablement that has made many people socially connected outweighs some of the situations where technology being the reason for making the people less sociable. I thus, completely agree with the above statement.
Technological advancements in this contemporary era have made citizens more socialized. The majority of the society members
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this, and the rest disagrees. I
strongly
admit with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
statement. This essay will provide an insight on both the views and relevant examples to support the opinion.

On the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
side, Thanks to the internet, which has made the world a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
global village, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
across the countries
are connected
through a
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
world wide web
network.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
across the globe are able to connect with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
ones through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking sites like Skype,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Whatsapp
& Facebook with minimal cost and effort.
Secondly
, Globalization has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the travelling costs, in such a way that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are able to cross the continents and nations using flights and bullet trains. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, online apps have brought more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
awareness like ordering clothes and food on the fingertips.

On the flip side of this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
made the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aspects.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
interactions has fallen down
drastically
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
bonding and networking
that is
being achieved
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
meets the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
strong that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
will not be able to achieve it.
For instance
, when two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a business or relationship, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
meeting brings in extra confidence to close the deal.

To summarize
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
enablement that has made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
socially
connected outweighs
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
situations where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
being the reason for making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
less sociable. I
thus
, completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the above statement.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay write to your friend about your favourite movie You do NOT need to write any addresses. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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