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Write about the following topic: Every country has poor people and every country has different ways of dealing with the poor. What are some of the reasons for world poverty? How can the poor be helped? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.1

: Every country has poor people and every country has different ways of dealing with the poor. What are some of the reasons for world poverty? How can the poor be helped? v. 1
There is no doubt that, World has an adequate share of poor population. While there are some countries who have succeeded in reducing the proportion of poor people, There are still many countries whose major population are poverty stricken. In this essay, we will discuss some of the reason of poverty and what can be the measures to help it. The most significant problem of destitution is unawareness or you can say lack of education. Many people are not exposed to schools or colleges of higher learnings. For instance, a young child of age 15 to 18 would be working in some hotel as a waiter or a driver rather than going for some higher education. This result in less paying jobs and reducing the quality of work being done. Another crucial reason for rich becoming richer and poor becoming poorer is inequality. This can be justified with example as rich and educated people have easy access to loans and other facilities like college admissions in compared to the poor people. In addition to this, government policies and strategies are much more convenient for the literate person than for the illiterate. For this, the government should make basic necessities available to overall people, which can help poor people to enhance their standard of living. Also, education should be made affordable, as it can be consumed as a basic requirement by every individual. In conclusion, World faces variety of problems of poverty due to illiteracy and inequality. However, these issues are not insurmountable. In my view, it is government’s responsibility to tackle these issues, and they should begin by considering some of the solutions mentioned above.
There is no doubt that, World has an adequate share of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
population. While there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries who have succeeded in reducing the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, There are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries whose major population are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
poverty stricken
. In this essay, we will discuss
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
reason of poverty and what can be the measures to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
it.

The most significant problem of destitution is unawareness or you can say lack of education.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not exposed to schools or colleges of higher learnings.
For instance
, a young child of age 15 to 18 would be working in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
hotel as a waiter or a driver
rather
than going for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
higher education. This result in less paying jobs and reducing the quality of work
being done
.

Another crucial reason for rich becoming richer and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
becoming poorer is inequality. This can
be justified
with example as rich and educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have easy access to loans and other facilities like college admissions in compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
In addition
to this,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
policies and strategies are much more convenient for the literate person than for the illiterate. For this, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
Consider using "necessities".
basic necessities
available to
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to enhance their standard of living.
Also
, education should
be made
affordable, as it can
be consumed
as a basic requirement by every individual.

In conclusion
, World faces variety of problems of poverty due to illiteracy and inequality.
However
, these issues are not insurmountable. In my view, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
’s responsibility to tackle these issues, and they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
by considering
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
solutions mentioned above.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS essay : Every country has poor people and every country has different ways of dealing with the poor. What are some of the reasons for world poverty? How can the poor be helped? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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