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work with mistakes 2 In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this. v.2

work with mistakes 2 In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this. v. 2
For generations in many countries young adults have been encouraged to take a gap year after high school. Below merits and drawbacks of the prospect will be discussed in details. On the one hand, there are several gains of the practice. Firstly, studying at high school and preparation for the final exams is a challenging and arduous task. In fact, many listeners are so exhausted that they may experience severe cases of anxiety, hysteria, and even a nervous breakdown. To address those psychological illnesses and syndromes doctors often prescribe having a journey to a foreign country. Secondly, some need get financial resources to pay for studying at university. Not going directly to a tertiary institution allows a person to earn and save up enough money to start education without taking a student loan. Accordingly, those are several benefits of having a year gap. On the other hand, some downsides ought to be mention as well. Primarily, those who took a gap year less likely will enroll in university. Statistics shows that the majority of those who began working after school have never pursued a degree and a potential reason for this is encountering the experience of liberation from parents and their rules. On the top of that, having the one-year leave may unfavorably influence on students’ academic records. In fact, young adults who avoid taking a gap year are more likely to graduate from university than those who took it. It is plausible to speculate that to study successfully a person should recall a lot of information from a school program and the data is well-remembered by those who went from school to university directly than by those who had the vacation. Those are a few negative facets of the custom. In conclusion, the tradition of having a gap year between school and university has some shortages and virtues and each person has a right to decide what is better for him or her.
For generations in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries young adults have
been encouraged
to take a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
after high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Below merits and drawbacks of the prospect will
be discussed
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
.

On the one hand, there are several gains of the practice.
Firstly
, studying at high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and preparation for the final exams is a challenging and arduous task. In fact,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
listeners are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
exhausted that they may experience severe cases of anxiety, hysteria, and even a nervous breakdown. To address those psychological illnesses and syndromes doctors
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
prescribe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a journey to a foreign country.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "needs"?
need
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
financial resources to pay for studying at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. Not going
directly
to a tertiary institution
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
a person to earn and save up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
education without taking a student loan.
Accordingly
, those are several benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
gap.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
downsides ought to be mention
as well
.
Primarily
, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
took a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
less likely will enroll in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. Statistics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the majority of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
began working after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
have never pursued a degree and a potential reason for this is encountering the experience of liberation from parents and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
. On the top of that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
the one-year
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
may
unfavorably
influence on students’ academic records. In fact, young adults
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
avoid taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
are more likely to graduate from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
than those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
took it. It is plausible to speculate that to study
successfully
a person should recall
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
information from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
program and the data is well-remembered by those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
went from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
Use "(directly)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
directly
than by those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
had the vacation. Those are a few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
facets of the custom.

In conclusion
, the tradition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
shortages and virtues and each person has a right to decide what is better for him or her.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay work with mistakes 2 In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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