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With the rapid advancement of communication technology eg smart phones tablets and other mobile devices some people believe that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages To what extent do you agree or disagree v.1

With the rapid advancement of communication technology eg smart phones tablets and other mobile devices some people believe that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages v. 1
It is true that in today's Society employers tend to hire employees who are academically qualified than those who held more life experiences or simply good people. I opine that this change is a mixed blessing that has both benefits and disadvantages for some companies. On the one hand, it seems that by hiring more employees with academic qualifications can boost a company's development the way it wants. Since these workers have received proper education from schooling, they can contribute to the business by applying their knowledge that they have learnt from Qualified field of works. These staffs are more trustworthy in terms of the level of education they have received. Therefore, by looking through the kind of degree that the person has, the company can easily determine if that is the personnel that they want at their company. On the other hand, it is equally important to hire experienced workers who own some valuable information from their Pervious mistakes. For instance, if a firm is facing a severe crisis in its developing stage, an experienced employee would be useful since he or she might have the knowledge of how to solve this very issue. Therefore, by having some experienced personnel in the industry, it would be more likely for the firm to tackle a major issue or avoid an unwanted situation. In conclusion, if a business would like to develop further in a the way that any business wanted, it would be important for them to hire both academically qualified and experienced workers.
It is true that in
today
's Society employers tend to hire employees who are
academically
qualified than those who held more life experiences or
simply
good
people
. I opine that this
change
is a mixed blessing that has both benefits and disadvantages for
some
companies
.

On the one hand, it seems that by hiring more employees with academic qualifications can boost a
company
's development the way it wants. Since these workers have received proper education from schooling, they can contribute to the business by applying their knowledge that they have
learnt
from Qualified field of works. These staffs are more trustworthy in terms of the level of education they have received.
Therefore
, by looking through the kind of degree that the person has, the
company
can
easily
determine if
that is
the personnel that they want at their
company
.

On the other hand
, it is
equally
important
to hire
experienced
workers who
own
some
valuable information from their
Pervious
mistakes.
For instance
, if a firm is facing a severe crisis in its developing stage, an
experienced
employee would be useful since he or she might have the knowledge of how to solve this
very
issue.
Therefore
, by having
some
experienced
personnel in the industry, it would be more likely for the firm to tackle a major issue or avoid an unwanted situation.

In conclusion
, if a business would like to develop
further
in
a the
way that any business wanted, it would be
important
for them to hire both
academically
qualified and
experienced
workers.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay With the rapid advancement of communication technology eg smart phones tablets and other mobile devices some people believe that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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