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While recruiting a new employee, the employer should pay more attention to their personal qualities, rather than qualifications and experience. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and include relevant examples. v.1

While recruiting a new employee, the employer should pay more attention to their personal qualities, rather than qualifications and experience. Give your opinion and include relevant examples. v. 1
It is commonly thought that a new employee should be offered a job based on his personal qualities rather than academic achievements. I completely disagree with this belief as I think that person's qualification and experience outweigh his personal qualities. In this essay I will offer supportive statements that are ground of my disagreement. To begin with, I believe that individual’s education is a hard-earned asset, it should be given more priority as compared to any other quality. After all, his qualification and experience makes him proficient to achieve tasks and thus benefit the company. In addition, it is the academic achievements and real life experiences that makes the individual’s identity. Also, it is a matter of fact that a person that holds engineering degree would handle the development projects in a better way than a person having good nature or better personal qualities. Another reason that compels me to disagree with thought to give more advantage to personal qualities is that, the qualities that we could learn by our own experience could not be gained by any other way. For example, it takes years of experience to become a good leader or a better team player. Thus, it is beneficial for the organization to look for qualification of an interviewer rather than his personal qualities. As per my opinion, a person could borrow a personal quality, however the academic qualities such as education and experience could not be borrowed by anyone. These educational qualities would benefit the organization not the personal qualities. Hence such qualities should be given more preference over personal qualities. In conclusion, qualification of a person holds more value than his personal qualities and I disagree with giving high priority to personal qualities while selecting a candidate for a job. Personal qualities do not make a person productive or competent for job. On the other side educational qualification and work experience provide him the qualities of leadership and team management skills.
It is
commonly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that a new employee should
be offered
a job based on his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
rather
than academic achievements. I completely disagree with this belief as I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
outweigh his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
. In this essay I will offer supportive statements that
are ground
of my disagreement.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, I believe that individual’s education is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
-earned asset, it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more priority as compared to any other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
.
After all
, his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
him proficient to achieve tasks and
thus
benefit the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
In addition
, it is the academic achievements and real life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the individual’s identity.
Also
, it is a matter of fact that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
that holds engineering degree would handle the development projects in a better way than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
nature or better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
qualities.

Another reason that compels me to disagree with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
to give more advantage to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
is that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
that we could learn by our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
could not
be gained
by any other way.
For example
, it takes years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
to become a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
leader or a better team player.
Thus
, it is beneficial for the organization to look for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
of an interviewer
rather
than his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
qualities.

As per my opinion, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
could borrow a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
,
however
the academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
such as education and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
could not
be borrowed
by anyone. These educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
would benefit the organization not the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more preference over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
qualities.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
holds more value than his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
and I disagree with giving high priority to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
while selecting a candidate for a job.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
productive or competent for job. On the other side educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
and work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
provide him the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
of leadership and team management
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
42Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay While recruiting a new employee, the employer should pay more attention to their personal qualities, rather than qualifications and experience. Give your opinion and include relevant examples. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
325 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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