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first impressions are important. some people think that doing well in interviews is the key to securing a good job. to what extent do you agree or disagree. v.1

first impressions are important. some people think that doing well in interviews is the key to securing a good job. v. 1
Nowadays, in cut-throat competitive world corporate industries are hiring multitalented employees who can represent them globally. There are many people who believe that an interviewee qualifies for a job not only because he has relevant degrees or experience but it is the first impression. I agree that body language and manners do play a major role in creating an influence over the interviewer. To begin with, body language portrays how optimistic a person is if hired to work on the company’s role. This is because straight shoulders and eye contact states that a person has confidence in his abilities, will cope-up with the work building stress and still have a good rapport with his colleagues. For instance, in a survey conducted by a job portal site named Monster. com got the highest votes from the human resource that they would prefer to hire an employee with a positive approach over extra degrees. As a result, employers are willing to arrange additional trainings to the new joiner to include them quickly in the flock for potential results. Furthermore, an interviewee dressing style and etiquettes displays professionalism and suitability to present company on the global platform. The reason for this is that in today’s world a company has clients present all over the world. Hence, when an employee travels to client’s office their behavioural presentation will either land a company with a potential customer or lose a business deal irrespective of the fact from where or for how many years they have studied in university. As a consequence, company has to analyse very sharply about the credibility’s of an employee before hiring. To conclude, due to globalization and marketing company profile a employee has to take into account the optimistic nature and presentation skill of the new joiner over the candidate with degrees.
Nowadays, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
-throat competitive world corporate industries are hiring multitalented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
who can represent them globally. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who believe that an interviewee qualifies for a job not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he has relevant degrees or experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is the
first
impression. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that body language and manners do play a major role in creating an influence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
the interviewer.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, body language portrays how optimistic a person is if hired to work on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
role. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
straight shoulders and eye contact states that a person has confidence in his abilities, will cope-up with the work building
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and
still
have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
rapport with his colleagues.
For instance
, in a survey conducted by a job portal site named Monster.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
com
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
the highest votes from the human resource that they would prefer to hire an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
with a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
approach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
extra degrees.
As a result
, employers are willing to arrange additional trainings to the new joiner to include them
quickly
in the flock for potential results.

Furthermore
, an interviewee dressing style and
Possible spelling mistake found.
etiquettes
displays professionalism and suitability to present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
on the global platform.
The reason for this is
that in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
has clients present all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
the world.
Hence
, when an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
travels to client’s office their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behavioural' is British English.
behavioural
presentation will either land a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
with a potential customer or lose a business deal irrespective of the fact from where or for how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years they have studied in university. As a consequence,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
sharply
about the credibility’s of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
hiring.

To conclude
, due to globalization and marketing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
profile
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
take into account the optimistic nature and presentation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
of the new joiner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
the candidate with degrees.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay first impressions are important. some people think that doing well in interviews is the key to securing a good job. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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