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While mobile phones have many advantages a number of problems have also resulted from them or the ways in which they are used What are some of these problems What solutions can you suggest for solving these problems v.2

While mobile phones have many advantages a number of problems have also resulted from them or the ways in which they are used What are some of these problems What solutions can you suggest for solving these problems v. 2
In a modernizing world, mobile phone becomes an essential device of every people. However, while cellphones create many utilities for their end-user, the way they are used may cause some negative effect on human, which is sometime overlooked. The problem of personal phones might be came from different aspect of living activities and their resolution also shown up various. The problematical issue that cellphones create to human today is simply related to the fact that mobile devices are become smarter rapidly. Since these smart mobile technology pieces is accessible to entertainment forms at any places, people are now abusing this feature that much of the time, they are unaware of connecting to the surrounding sociality. Presently, it is not hard to see group friends get their head only on phones while going out instead of talking and spending their quality time with the others. The issue can be eased in term of every single person controlling their needs of media or game consuming, people need to aware that humane bonding time is more fundamental rather than mediocre screen entertainment. From a children nurturing perspective, many parent are currently abusing the relaxation function of mobile phone to assist with their children caring periods. The games, cartoon that is would easily can be found by adult on any smart phone services is full of delight for their kids. Despite the fact that there can be a large amount of inappropriate content mixed with the entertaining consuming forms that they feed their children, modern parents seem to be overused the phones to take care of their young beloved ones. Catched up with the situation, abundance of video and game providers are now supporting child-care with their products such as reviewed content and limited consuming time function are now added. Friendly all-age-appropriated content seems to be a great suitable solving method for this conundrum and are being expanded widely. Although mobile phones are now caring many positive aspect to human life, they are usually be used without cautions. The recommended prescribed usage method should be accounted from the phone services providers, educators and every parent to their children and themselves.
In a modernizing world, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
becomes an essential device of every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
However
, while cellphones create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
utilities for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
-user, the way they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
may cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
, which is sometime overlooked. The problem of personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
might
Did you mean "became"?
be came
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
aspect of living activities and their resolution
also
shown up various.

The problematical issue that cellphones create to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is
simply
related to the fact that mobile devices
are become
smarter
rapidly
. Since these smart mobile technology pieces is accessible to entertainment forms at any places,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
abusing this feature that much of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, they are unaware of connecting to the surrounding
Possible spelling mistake found.
sociality
.
Presently
, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
group friends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their head
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
while going out
instead
of talking and spending their quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with the others. The issue can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eased
in term of every single person controlling their needs of media or game consuming,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
need to aware that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humane
bonding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is more fundamental
rather
than mediocre screen entertainment.

From a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
nurturing perspective,
Possible agreement error. The noun parent seems to be countable; consider using: "many parents".
many parent
are
currently
abusing the relaxation function of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
to assist with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
caring periods. The games, cartoon that
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
is would
easily
can
be found
by adult on any smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
services is full of delight for their kids. Despite the fact that there can be a large amount of inappropriate content mixed with the entertaining consuming forms that they feed their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, modern parents seem to
be overused
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
to take care of their young beloved ones.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Catched
up with the situation, abundance of video and game providers are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
supporting child-care with their products such as reviewed content and limited consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
function are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
. Friendly all-age-appropriated content seems to be a great suitable solving method for this conundrum and are
being expanded
widely
.

Although mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
caring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
life, they are
usually
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
without cautions. The recommended prescribed usage method should
be accounted
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
services providers, educators and every parent to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and themselves.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay While mobile phones have many advantages a number of problems have also resulted from them or the ways in which they are used What are some of these problems What solutions can you suggest for solving these problems v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
356 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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