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When talking about success, we often think of people who are rich or famous. In your opinion, what are the qualities that characterise a successful person? Why do you think these should be the criteria? v.5

When talking about success, we often think of people who are rich or famous. In your opinion, what are the qualities that characterise a successful person? Why do you think these should be the criteria? v. 5
People usually consider the bank balance and fame as a measure of an individual's success. Surely enough, successful people tend to be rich and be recognised by everyone, yet many neglect the hard work and patience required to reach the summit. Successful personalities like Elon Musk, Bill Gates, and many more have shared their life experiences for others to follow, and in my opinion, the most important traits for a successful career are, being disciplined and being a abide reader. Many celebrities, in their interviews have stated that, following disciplines in life is the first step towards being successful. However, it is not limited to only follow a fixed routine; it's rather much more than that, including efficient time management. The individuals are successful because they are able to devote time for everything, including a quality family time, which helps them focus their energy and not to get over stressed. For example, famous actor Akshay Kumar, while being interviewed shared his morning routine which begins 4: 00am in the morning, followed by yoga and exercise which he said energise him fully for the busy day ahead. Secondly, reading is also one of the most important characteristic feature of any accomplished person. This reading habit helps them to gain knowledge and increase their understanding of the subject. This not only makes them smart, but referring good literature makes them wiser and enables them to take informed decisions. Recently Forbes conducted a survey wherein they interviewed the managers of top 50 global companies; 91% of which agreed to be abide readers. In conclusion, undoubtedly getting rich and being celebrated by others are outcomes of being successful. And in my opinion, the main qualities that characterize a successful person is his love for reading and the discipline he maintains in his personal and work life.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
usually
consider the bank balance and fame as a measure of an individual's success.
Surely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to be rich and be
Possible spelling mistake. 'recognised' is British English.
recognised
by everyone,
yet
Possible agreement error. The noun neglect seems to be uncountable; consider using: "much neglect", "a good deal of neglect".
many neglect
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and patience required to reach the summit.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Successful
personalities like Elon Musk, Bill Gates, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more have shared their life experiences for others to follow, and in my opinion, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
traits for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
career are,
being disciplined
and being
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
abide reader.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
celebrities, in their interviews have stated that, following disciplines in life is the
first
step towards being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
.
However
, it is not limited to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
follow a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
routine; it's
rather
much more than that, including efficient time management. The individuals are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are able to devote time for everything, including a quality family time, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them focus their energy and not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
over
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
actor Akshay Kumar, while
being interviewed
shared his morning routine which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
4: 00am in the morning, followed by yoga and exercise which he said
Possible spelling mistake. 'energise' is British English.
energise
him
fully
for the busy day ahead.

Secondly
, reading is
also
one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
characteristic feature of any accomplished person. This reading habit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to gain knowledge and increase their understanding of the subject. This not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them smart,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
referring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
literature
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them wiser and enables them to take informed decisions. Recently Forbes conducted a survey wherein they interviewed the managers of top 50 global
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
; 91% of which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
to be abide readers.

In conclusion
,
undoubtedly
getting rich and
being celebrated
by others are outcomes of being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
. And in my opinion, the main qualities that characterize a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
person is his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
for reading and the discipline he maintains in his personal and work life.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay When talking about success, we often think of people who are rich or famous. In your opinion, what are the qualities that characterise a successful person? Why do you think these should be the criteria? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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