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Some employers are giving increased importance to employing people with good social skills in addition to good qualifications. Do you agree or disagree that social skills are as important as good qualifications for success in a job? v.1

Some employers are giving increased importance to employing people with good social skills in addition to good qualifications. that social skills are as important as good qualifications for success in a job? v. 1
While some individuals would argue that recruiters these days are emphasizing more on the excellent social skills along with the essential qualifications. This essay agrees with the given statement because an employee should be able to communicate well with the customers, and moreover, such qualities bring good reputation to the companies. To commence with, individuals at the workstations have to be part of the various conversations with the staff members as well as the other people who are linked with the organisation. Since a worker is a social person, as he may have to work on a project in which the main focus is on influencing the others with his presentation, therefore, despite being highly qualified, he would not be able to impress them if he lacks certain skills. In schools, for instance, teachers have to interact with the parents in the teacher's meet. If they will not have good communication abilities, then they will find themselves unable to convey their message. Thus, it is appropriate to look for the social interacting traits by the employers. Another possible reason is their desire for the maintenance of the right status in the society. It is interesting to note that the friendly behaviour of the employees would attract the clients towards those organisations because in such cases, an enormous number of people would love to buy their products due to the better dealing system. In a marketing job, for example, one must be able to influence the buyers to convince about the features of their products, only then the sale would rise. To elucidate, a hard working staff will enhance the popularity and bring name to the company in the market with the good marketing skills. In conclusion, although a vast majority of recruiters explore those candidates who are easy to get on with the community apart from their professional degrees. I believe that in the contemporary world, with the cut-throat competition all over the world, this has become the need of the hour. It cannot be denied that it will in turn increase the reputation and enhancement of the fame among the consumers.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals would argue that recruiters these days are emphasizing more on the excellent social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
along with the essential qualifications. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
an employee should be able to communicate well with the customers, and
moreover
, such qualities bring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reputation to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

To commence with, individuals at the workstations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be part of the various conversations with the staff members
as well
as the other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
are linked
with the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
. Since a worker is a social person, as he may
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work on a project in which the main focus is on influencing the others with his presentation,
therefore
, despite being
highly
qualified, he would not be able to impress them if he lacks certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. In schools,
for instance
, teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
interact with the parents in the teacher's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
. If they
Consider removing 'will'. (Usually, 'will' does not occur in a conditional clause, unless in the sense 'want to' or 'be willing to'.)
will not have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
communication abilities, then they will find themselves unable to convey their message.
Thus
, it is appropriate to look for the social interacting traits by the employers.

Another possible reason is their desire for the maintenance of the right status in the society. It is interesting to note that the friendly
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of the employees would attract the clients towards those
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in such cases, an enormous number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
their products due to the better dealing system. In a marketing job,
for example
, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be able to influence the buyers to convince about the features of their products,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
then the sale would rise. To elucidate, a
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
hard working
staff will enhance the popularity and bring name to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
in the market with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
marketing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

In conclusion
, although a vast majority of recruiters explore those candidates who are easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
on with the community apart from their professional degrees. I believe that in the contemporary world, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
-throat competition all over the world, this has become the need of the hour. It cannot
be denied
that it will in turn increase the reputation and enhancement of the fame among the consumers.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
We should learn languages because language is the only thing worth knowing even poorly.
Kató Lomb

IELTS essay Some employers are giving increased importance to employing people with good social skills in addition to good qualifications. that social skills are as important as good qualifications for success in a job? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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