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When choosing a place to live, what do you consider most important-location, size, style, number of rooms, types of rooms, or other features? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer. v.1

When choosing a place to live, what do you consider most important-location, size, style, number of rooms, types of rooms, or other features? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer. v. 1
With modernization, the lifestyle of people transformed massively. It is often debated issue that whether authorities should take decisions regarding citizen’s lifestyle or the individual should have absolute authority and decision making in cultural and other lifestyle choices. In my opinion, there are certain things that should be in control of the government while people should also retain the right to maintain their lives. This essay will analyse both sides of the arguments. In developed countries and democratic nations, citizens have the power to make choices and lead lives with freedom, but the public should be aware as well as responsible for their actions. For instance, smoking is hazardous to health and is prohibited in public places as it can impact others. However, the government has never restricted the use and sale of cigarettes and alcohol as its consumption is one’s personal choice until it is not harming other citizens. There are certain professions as well as activities, which should be in control of political establishments as exploiting them can become threatening to the public. Government can provide guidelines to the people in making the decisions on their lifestyle. Since, it is illegal to drive a vehicle after drinking alcohol because it can be perilous for road safety. Furthermore, it threatens other’s safety too. Considering the outcome, the administration has created policies for road safety. An individual and society should know their actions and its consequence. As long as that doesn’t affect the environment and humans adversely it is acceptable but not otherwise. To conclude, laws should be there to encourage a healthy lifestyle. At the same time, people should be allowed to take decisions concerning their private affairs without breaching rules for the larger benefit of the society.
With modernization, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
transformed
massively
. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
debated issue that whether authorities should take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decisions
regarding citizen’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
or the individual should have absolute authority and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
decision making
in cultural and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
choices. In my opinion, there are certain things that should be in control of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
also
retain the right to maintain their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
both sides of the arguments.

In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
and democratic nations, citizens have the power to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
choices and lead
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
with freedom,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the public should be aware
as well
as responsible for their actions.
For instance
, smoking is hazardous to health and
is prohibited
in public places as it can impact others.
However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has never restricted the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
and sale of cigarettes and alcohol as its consumption is one’s personal choice until it is not harming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
citizens.

There are certain professions
as well
as activities, which should be in control of political establishments as exploiting them can become threatening to the public.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
can provide guidelines to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decisions
on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
. Since, it is illegal to drive a vehicle after drinking alcohol
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can be perilous for road safety.
Furthermore
, it threatens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other’s
safety too. Considering the outcome, the administration has created policies for road safety. An individual and society should know their actions and its consequence. As long as that doesn’t affect the environment and humans
adversely
it is acceptable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
otherwise
.

To conclude
, laws should be there to encourage a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
. At the same time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decisions
concerning their private affairs without breaching
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
for the larger benefit of the society.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay When choosing a place to live, what do you consider most important-location, size, style, number of rooms, types of rooms, or other features? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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