Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion. v.25

When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. with this opinion. v. 25
Technology developments have enhanced many people's lives. It is argued that the traditional skills have vanished and it's useless when a country improves its technology. However, olden day practices are meaningless to make them live. In my opinion, I agree with the view of the statements. Firstly, technology keeps us more enthusiastic to learn and thrive for knowledge. This is because of a rise in automation worldwide to reduce the physical energy of manual work. Consequently, during the early days, there was no mental work instead of physical. However, due to top-notch software and machines, there is a vast increase in learning digitally to opt for the modern world. For instance, Innovation has resulted in vanishing traditional skills. Secondly, Technology has grown enormously nowadays for making people work more convenient and secure. In other words, Facebook and what's app are being a point of contact for many people in this modern era. This means that people have adapted to interact through modern software without the physical appearance of another human through modernized software. As a result, widely used software to help people in many ways, like a cost-efficient. For example, 75% of the world population interact with other people in the form of digital communication rather than physically and they prefer this form of interaction more. In conclusion, When technology improves old skills are to be disappeared because new tech keeps humans more energetic and productive with the ease of accessibility rather than old skills. There is no use of olden day skills when there is a new improvement.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
developments have enhanced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. It
is argued
that the traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
have vanished and it's useless when a country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
However
, olden day practices are meaningless to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the view of the statements.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
us more enthusiastic to learn and thrive for knowledge. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a rise in automation worldwide to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the physical energy of manual work.
Consequently
, during the early days, there was no mental work
instead
of physical.
However
, due to top-notch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
software
and machines, there is a vast increase in learning
digitally
to opt for the modern world.
For instance
, Innovation has resulted in vanishing traditional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
has grown
enormously
nowadays for making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
work more convenient and secure.
In other words
, Facebook and what's app are being a point of contact for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in this modern era. This means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have adapted to interact through modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
software
without the physical appearance of another human through modernized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
software
.
As a result
,
widely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
software
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways, like
Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
a cost-efficient
.
For example
, 75% of the world population interact with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the form of digital communication
rather
than
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
physically and
they prefer this form of interaction more.

In conclusion
, When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are to
be disappeared
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
new tech
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
humans more energetic and productive with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
of accessibility
rather
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. There is no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of olden day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
when there is a new improvement.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
Speak a new language so that the world will be a new world.
Rumi

IELTS essay When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. with this opinion. v. 25

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts