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When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.17

When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. with this opinion? v. 17
Over the past decades, there have been a vast number of technology breakthroughs. It is widely believed that it is meaningless to (remain) preserve conventional lifestyles or skills. I strongly disagree with this point of view, as I suppose that they always bring particular values in our life. On the one hand, technology brings positive impacts in various aspects in daily life. In fact, there have been more and more innovative machines in many fields such as science, education, or daily domestic activities which are extremely useful and convenient. In terms of domestic chores, for example, many families in big cities, parents often buy labor-saving devices like vacuum cleaners, washing machines, or dishwashers, instead of wasting a long time to do that, so they are able to control their time more flexibly to do necessary or pleasant things like reading books or cooking. Plenty of evidence suggests that technology has affected positively to our life so much. On the other hand, traditional ways or skills demonstrates cultural values. These values are customs, festival, or traditional jobs, which are (transmitted) passed from generation to generation. For instance, in many village areas in Viet Nam, the locals have produced conical hats, which are an important component of traditional wear for women, offered for sale to tourists. Therefore, it is tremendously significant to preserve traditions alive, by this way we are distributing a small part to our country. In conclusion, although it could be denied that technology has had beneficial effects, I personally believe that it is necessary to maintain and preserve such old traditions.
Over the past decades, there have been a vast number of
technology
breakthroughs. It is
widely
believed that it is meaningless to (remain) preserve conventional lifestyles or
skills
. I
strongly
disagree with this point of view, as I suppose that they always bring particular values in our life.

On the one hand,
technology
brings
positive
impacts in various aspects in daily life. In fact, there have been more and more innovative machines in
many
fields such as science, education, or daily domestic activities which are
extremely
useful and convenient. In terms of domestic chores,
for example
,
many
families in
big
cities, parents
often
buy
labor-saving devices like vacuum cleaners, washing machines, or dishwashers,
instead
of wasting a long time to do that,
so
they are able to control their time more
flexibly
to do necessary or pleasant things like reading books or cooking.
Plenty
of evidence suggests that
technology
has
affected
positively
to our life
so
much.

On the other hand
, traditional ways or
skills
demonstrates cultural values. These values are customs, festival, or traditional jobs, which are (transmitted) passed from generation to generation.
For instance
, in
many
village areas in
Viet
Nam, the locals have produced conical hats, which are an
important
component of traditional wear for women, offered for sale to tourists.
Therefore
, it is
tremendously
significant to preserve traditions alive, by this way we are distributing a
small
part to our country.

In conclusion
, although it could
be denied
that
technology
has had beneficial effects, I
personally
believe that it is necessary to maintain and preserve such
old
traditions.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. with this opinion? v. 17

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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