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what kind of reading material novels, magazines or poetry u would like to read in your free time? v.1

what kind of reading material novels, magazines or poetry u would like to read in your free time? v. 1
Nowadays, an increasing number of tourists are travelling to places where conditions are arduous such as the Sahara desert and the Antarctic region. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of this trend. There are some positive outcomes with this development. To begin with, it is beneficial in terms of exploring the environment of such areas. Places such as the Antarctic region, which is at the North Pole is not explored, thereby tourists going there would lead to knowledge about the climate and living situation. Furthermore, the tourists’ influx to such areas may encourage countries to develop infrastructure. If visitors opt for these places, there would arise a need for constructing roads, building hospitals and restaurants. A recent study, for instance, showed that in 2009 the tourists’ influx to an area in Japan results in 30% infrastructure development in that area. However, this trend comes with negative outcomes. Firstly, travelling to these places may be dangerous for visitors. This is because the climate and the routes are not adoptable for humans and may result in the death of tourists. The World Environment Agency, for example, showed a study that while travelling to the Antarctic region in 2005, five American citizens out of ten had died due to the temperature below minus fifty. Secondly, tourists’ influx to such areas results in producing trash. Visitors after using products normally throw it away due to the unavailability of bins, which, in turn, results in environmental pollution. In conclusion, tourists visiting difficult places have advantages such as exploring the area and the infrastructure growth; whereas, the disadvantages are that it is dangerous for visitors and produce garbage.
Nowadays, an increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
are travelling to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
where conditions are arduous such as the Sahara desert and the Antarctic region. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of this trend.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcomes with this development. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it is beneficial in terms of exploring the environment of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Places
such as the Antarctic region, which is at the North Pole is not explored, thereby
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
going there would lead to knowledge about the climate and living situation.
Furthermore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists’
influx to such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
may encourage countries to develop infrastructure. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
opt for these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, there would arise a need for constructing roads, building hospitals and restaurants. A recent study,
for instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that in 2009 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists’
influx to an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
in Japan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
results
in 30% infrastructure development in that area.

However
, this trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
outcomes.
Firstly
, travelling to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
may be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the climate and the routes are not adoptable for humans and may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
result
in the death of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
. The World Environment Agency,
for example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a study that while travelling to the Antarctic region in 2005, five American citizens out of ten had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
due to the temperature below minus fifty.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists’
influx to such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
results
in producing trash.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Visitors
after using products
normally
throw it away due to the unavailability of bins, which, in turn,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
results
in environmental pollution.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
visiting difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
have advantages such as exploring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
and the infrastructure growth; whereas, the disadvantages are that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
and produce garbage.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay what kind of reading material novels, magazines or poetry u would like to read in your free time? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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