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2 Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people v.1

2 Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people v. 1
It is said that History is one of the most relevant subjects in education. Conversely, some argue that subjects such as Science and Technology are more important than History, nowadays. This essay is going to evolve both points of views and present my opinion on this discussion. Scientific and techonological studies are crucial to our contemporaries because the solutions to the most serious problems our planet is facing or will face rely on the development of research in these subjects. In other words, the many people interested in studying science, the many are the chances of discovering a cure for cancer, for example. Hence, many lives could be saved by prioritising the advance of scientific subjects at school. However, the study of history plays a fundamental role in all societies since they can know their past through it. By acknowledging this, they can uderstand their present and eventually, make predictions for the future. For instance, if the autorities would not be able to know all the economic disadvantages behind a war present in historical books, they would not make an effort to keep the peace as they have done since The Second World War. As a result, the study of History is saving lives and economies all over the world as well. To conclude, I totally disagree that History is currently less important than Science and Technology as subjects at school. I would say that both are assets in young people's education and they should be held in higher regards.
It
is said
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is one of the most relevant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in education.
Conversely
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as Science and Technology are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
, nowadays. This essay is going to evolve both points of views and present my opinion on this discussion.

Scientific and
Possible spelling mistake found.
techonological
studies are crucial to our contemporaries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the solutions to the most serious problems our planet is facing or will face rely on the development of research in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
.
In other words
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
interested in studying science, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
are the chances of discovering a cure for cancer,
for example
.
Hence
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
could
be saved
by
Possible spelling mistake. 'prioritising' is British English.
prioritising
the advance of scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
at school.

However
, the study of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
plays a fundamental role in all societies since they can know their past through it. By acknowledging this, they can
Possible spelling mistake found.
uderstand
their present and
eventually
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
predictions for the future.
For instance
, if the
Possible spelling mistake found.
autorities
would not be able to know all the economic disadvantages behind a war present in historical books, they would not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an effort to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the peace as they have done since The Second World War.
As a result
, the study of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is saving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and economies all over the world
as well
.

To conclude
, I
totally
disagree that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
is
currently
less
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than Science and Technology as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
at school. I would say that both are assets in young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
education and
they should
be held
in higher regards.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 2 Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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