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What do you consider to be the most important room in a house? Why is this room more important to you than any other room? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v.1

What do you consider to be the most important room in a house? Why is this room more important to you than any other room? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 1
There is no doubt that jail is a very tough experience for anyone who lives or stays even for a short time there. Therefore, many people believe that such a punishment should be halted as it’s not always the best solution to minimizing the crime rate in their society. Alternatively seeking for the core of the problem might be more effective. In contrast, lots of other people still find the prison is the optimal place for some dangerous individuals who have an extremely bad influence on society. This essay aims to discuss both views in further detail before coming to a conclusion. To begin with, it’s irrefutable that prison is the best sanction for vicious individuals who broke the rules and do some illegal activities. Moreover, it provides great lessons for other people who are aiming to do the same which might finish them up at the jail. Therefore, such action makes the whole community safe and free from crime. Furthermore, jails anywhere are a bad area to spend even for a few minutes over there. Thus, the majority of people are doing their best to avert such an experience in their whole lifetime, since it impacts on people images in their society. For instance, Syrian criminal who convicted by any illegal issue might find massive difficulties in finding jobs or be accepted by any reputable university. That's why entering prison might affect people' lives in various ways. On the flip side, jail might exacerbate criminal attitude and motivate them to do more crimes. To illustrate, prison contains different criminals who might be committed for small crimes such as robberies or very serious crimes such as murdering or drug trading or smuggling. Thus, dozen of stories and bad experience might be distributed throughout the prison and attracting others to perform more crimes. As a result, the crime level may drastically increase due to prison penalty. Therefore, putting all guilty individuals inside the jail will only postpone the issue. In fact, governments should investigate in the core of these issues to overcome and alleviate the level of crime. For example, many advanced nations such as Canada is generating new punishment methods based on the crime type such as volunteering tasks. These measurements indeed played an instrumental role in enhancing criminal attitude as well as prepare them to become a productive member of their society. To sum up, prison arguably is a very debatable issue for a lot of people as some of them think that it’s the best way to cut the crime level while others believe that worsen that issue.
There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jail
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
tough experience for anyone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
or stays even for a short time there.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that such a punishment should
be halted
as it’s not always the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
solution to minimizing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate in their society.
Alternatively
seeking for the core of the problem
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be more effective.
In contrast
, lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
find the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
is the optimal place for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have an
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influence on society. This essay aims to discuss both views in
further
detail
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
coming to a conclusion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it’s irrefutable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
sanction for vicious individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
broke the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
illegal activities.
Moreover
, it provides great lessons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are aiming to do the same which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
finish them up at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jail
.
Therefore
, such action
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the whole community safe and free from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jails
anywhere are a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
area to spend even for a few minutes over there.
Thus
, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are doing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
to avert such an experience in their whole lifetime, since it impacts on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
images
in their society.
For instance
, Syrian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
convicted by any illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
find massive difficulties in finding jobs or be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
by any reputable university. That's why entering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
affect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
'
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in various ways.

On the flip side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
exacerbate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
attitude and motivate them to do more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. To illustrate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
contains
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be committed
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
such as robberies or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
such as murdering or drug trading or smuggling.
Thus
,
Use "a dozen" or use a number before 'dozen'.
dozen
of stories and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be distributed
throughout the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
and attracting others to perform more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
As a result
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
level may
drastically
increase due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
penalty.
Therefore
, putting all guilty individuals inside the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jail
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
postpone the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
. In fact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should investigate in the core of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
to overcome and alleviate the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advanced nations such as Canada is generating new punishment methods based on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
type such as volunteering tasks. These measurements
indeed
played an instrumental role in enhancing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
attitude
as well
as prepare them to become a productive member of their society.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
arguably
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
debatable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it’s the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
best
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
level while others believe that worsen that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay What do you consider to be the most important room in a house? Why is this room more important to you than any other room? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
430 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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