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Wealthy nations should assist poorer countries with humanitarian relief during natural disasters. Do you agree or disagree? v.3

Many people believe that rich countries should help poorer nations when they are hit by calamities. I strongly agree with the statement as it is the moral responsibility for wealthy nations to provide assistance to the poor and that they can give better help. First of all, for the sake of humanity, there’s no doubt that rich countries are morally obligated to help the deprived nations. Helping those who need help is the moral value that holds true to every nations, particularly those who are affluent. Furthermore, many rich countries exploited and colonized the poor during the war. This way the help given is also considered as a “pay back”. For example, the countries that colonized the areas in Africa are the proponents of giving resources and medical help to relief the devastation as the result of natural disaster. Rich nations may contribute more effective help. Many developed nations have better resources and professionals to aid the countries that are impacted by disasters. Consequently, with the readiness of the wealthy nations, the assistance can be more impactful to the poor nations. When Kenya and Zambia was hit by a major drought and ebola virus, many wealthy nations help the local governments by contributing in the research to quickly solve the problems. In conclusion, It is undeniable that rich countries should aid those who are in need as it is their moral obligation. In addidtion, rich countries are more ready to help given its resources and the workforce with more experience.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
poorer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
when they
are hit
by calamities. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement as it is the moral responsibility for wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
to provide assistance to the poor and that they can give better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

Often, this adverbial phrase is redundant. Consider using “first”.
First of all
, for the sake of humanity, there’s no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
morally
obligated to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the deprived
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. Helping those who need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
is the moral value that holds true to every
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “nation”?
nations
,
particularly
those who are affluent.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
exploited and colonized the poor during the war. This way the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
is
also
considered as a “pay back”.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that colonized the areas in Africa are the proponents of giving resources and medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to relief the devastation as the result of natural disaster.

Rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
may contribute more effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
have better resources and professionals to aid the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that
are impacted
by disasters.
Consequently
, with the readiness of the wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
, the assistance can be more impactful to the poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. When Kenya and Zambia
was hit
by a major drought and
Possible spelling mistake found.
ebola
virus,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
by contributing in the research to
quickly
solve the problems.

In conclusion
, It is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should aid those who are in need as it is their moral obligation. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
addidtion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are more ready to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
its resources and the workforce with more experience.
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IELTS essay Wealthy nations should assist poorer countries with humanitarian relief during natural disasters.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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