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Using the example of goats from the lecture, explain the two benefits of animal domestication for early humans. v.1

Using the example of goats from the lecture, explain the two benefits of animal domestication for early humans. v. 1
Climate change represents a major threat to life on earth. A certain segment argued that we need to accept it rather than try to stop it. I completely disagree with the statement, because I think we still have time to tackle this issue and reduce the human impact on the earth's climate There are myriad measures that governments and individuals could take to prevent or at least mitigate, climate change. Governments could introduce laws to limit the carbon dioxide emissions that leads to global warming. They could impose " green taxes " on drivers, airline companies and other polluters and they could invest in renewable energy production from solar, wind and water power. As individuals, we should also try to limit our contribution to climate change, by becoming more energy efficient, by using bicycles and public transport. Moreover, prevention and adaptation have to go on simultaneously to balance the climate change. Expanding the statements, if instead of taking the above measures we simply try to live the climate change. I believe that the consequences will be disastrous. To epitomize, if we use more air-conditioners in the summers then, these luxuries may cause more pollution and global warming. Therefore, the rise in temperature may go exponential. Additionally, over the last decade, we have had the highest and the lowest ever recorded temperatures, the worst ever floods, the most devastating Storms, hurricanes and tsunamis and many other natural disasters which are the direct result of climate change. In conclusion, it can be reiterated that changes in the weather are occurring needs to be controlled. Otherwise, that day is not far, when there will be litter or no life on earth.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
represents a major threat to life on earth. A certain segment argued that we need to accept it
rather
than try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
it. I completely disagree with the statement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
we
still
have time to tackle this issue and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the human impact on the earth's
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
climate


There are myriad measures that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and individuals could take to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
or at least mitigate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
could introduce laws to limit the carbon dioxide emissions that leads to global warming. They could impose
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
"
green taxes
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
"
on drivers, airline
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and other
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
polluters and
they could invest in renewable energy production from solar, wind and water power. As individuals, we should
also
try to limit our contribution to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
, by becoming more energy efficient, by using bicycles and public transport.
Moreover
, prevention and adaptation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go on
simultaneously
to balance the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

Expanding the statements, if
instead
of taking the above measures we
simply
try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
. I believe that the consequences will be disastrous. To epitomize, if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
more air-conditioners in the summers then, these luxuries may cause more pollution and global warming.
Therefore
, the rise in temperature may go exponential.
Additionally
, over the last decade, we have had the highest and the lowest ever recorded temperatures, the worst ever floods, the most devastating Storms, hurricanes and tsunamis and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other natural disasters which are the direct result of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

In conclusion
, it can
be reiterated
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
in the weather are occurring needs to
be controlled
.
Otherwise
, that day is not far, when there will be litter or no life on earth.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Using the example of goats from the lecture, explain the two benefits of animal domestication for early humans. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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