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University students often focus on one subject. However, some people think that universities should encourage students to learn a range of other subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

University students often focus on one subject. However, some people think that universities should encourage students to learn a range of other subjects. v. 3
Nowadays, some universities teach their students to study only one subject which led many people to argue that they should persuade students to learn diverse subjects. I completely agree with the statement and further paragraphs will elaborate the reasons. Firstly, teaching other subjects will keep student enthusiastic. Different subjects will give various knowledge so students will not get bored with only one subject, they can learn something new beyond their field. For example, a recent study conducted by the University of Alberta shows that the teaching interesting subject before boring subject can attract students` focus better. This method is so beneficial to the students who hate some subjects. Secondly, various subjects will give student general knowledge about the subjects which are out of their syllabus. With the basic knowledge of many fields, the pupil would be able to perceive so many things which are not included in their field subjects. For example, if we teach philosophy to an engineer, they would become active thinkers and may solve their personal problems easily. Due to this, every student will have diverse skills which they can use to make their life easier. In conclusion, this essay discussed that why is it important to learn a variety of subjects rather than any single particular topic. This has various benefits like a broad set of skills.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
universities teach their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
which led
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to argue that they should persuade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to learn diverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement and
further
paragraphs will elaborate the reasons.

Firstly
, teaching other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
enthusiastic.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
will give various knowledge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
bored with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, they can learn something new beyond their field.
For example
, a recent study conducted by the University of Alberta
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the teaching interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
boring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
can attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students`
focus better. This method is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
beneficial to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who hate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
subjects.

Secondly
, various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
will give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
general knowledge about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which are out of their syllabus. With the basic knowledge of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fields, the pupil would be able to perceive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things which are not included in their field
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
.
For example
, if we teach philosophy to an engineer, they would become active thinkers and may solve their personal problems
easily
. Due to this, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
will have diverse
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
which they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their life easier.

In conclusion
, this essay discussed that why is it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to learn a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
rather
than any single particular topic. This has various benefits like a broad set of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
It is astonishing how much enjoyment one can get out of a language that one understands imperfectly.
Basil Lanneau Gildersleeve

IELTS essay University students often focus on one subject. However, some people think that universities should encourage students to learn a range of other subjects. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
221 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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