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University students always focus on one specialist subject, but some people think universities should encourage their students to study a range of subjects in addition to their own subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

University students always focus on one specialist subject, but some people think universities should encourage their students to study a range of subjects in addition to their own subject. v. 2
The focusing of one specialist subject among the university students is debatable. The Major portion of students believe that studying a range of subjects is an extra benefit, while the rest of the crowd tends to focus on one subject. This essay will provide strong evidence for choosing a range of subjects in the curriculum. All the universities, should motivate their students to study a range of subjects with their main subject, as having knowledge in one subject will narrow down their carrier and at times may also create a situation of unemployment. The Unemployment tends to create more fear among the individuals, and in few situations this many also lead to the mental stress. If the candidates wish to learn just their main subject, it develops disinterest in them in a long run, which makes them to score less. However, after learning a variety of subjects, one can choose their interested domain and then can narrow down for future specialization. If at that time the job opportunities for their own subject has gone down, one can also work in other sectors. As, an illustration if one needs to get employed, that person should be good at communication skills, so for this the basic English course must be taken. It is interesting to note that many of the subjects are interrelated with each other. Gaining knowledge in many fields will produce a good individual, in such a manner, the individuals will be able to fit into any sort of jobs. To give a clear example, a doctor who is specialised in taking MRI scans needs have basic knowledge of physics. So, from this also it is depicted that each and every subject is based on one another. Clearly, the student with the all-round knowledge has an apparent advantage of shining more. In conclusion, it is strongly evident that the student who has wide knowledge about many subjects tend to get a better position in the society. The Unemployment rate is brought down to a greater extent and stress is also reduced, as both the unemployment and the stress are directly proportional to each other.
The focusing of one specialist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
among the university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
is debatable. The Major portion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
believe that studying a range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is an extra benefit, while the rest of the crowd tends to focus on one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
. This essay will provide strong evidence for choosing a range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in the curriculum.

All the universities, should motivate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to study a range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
with their main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, as having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
will narrow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
down
their carrier and at times may
also
create a situation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unemployment
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Unemployment
tends to create more fear among the individuals, and in few situations this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
also
lead to the mental
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. If the candidates wish to learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
their main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, it develops disinterest in them in a long run, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them to score less.
However
, after learning a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, one can choose their interested domain and then can narrow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
down
for future specialization. If at that time the job opportunities for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
has gone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
down
, one can
also
work in other sectors. As, an illustration if one needs to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
employed, that person should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
for this the basic English course
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be taken
.

It is interesting to note that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are interrelated
with each other. Gaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fields will produce a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
individual, in such a manner, the individuals will be able to fit into any sort of jobs. To give a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
example, a doctor who is
Possible spelling mistake. 'specialised' is British English.
specialised
in taking MRI scans needs have basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
of physics.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, from this
also
it
is depicted
that each and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
is based
on one another.
Clearly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
with the all-round
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
has an apparent advantage of shining more.

In conclusion
, it is
strongly
evident that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
who has wide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a better position in the society. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Unemployment
rate
is brought
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
down
to a greater extent and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
is
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
, as both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unemployment
and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
are
directly
proportional to each other.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay University students always focus on one specialist subject, but some people think universities should encourage their students to study a range of subjects in addition to their own subject. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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