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Some young people are leaving countryside to live in cities and towns, leaving only old people in countryside? What are the problems of this issue? What can be done to solve this problem? v.2

Some young people are leaving countryside to live in cities and towns, leaving only old people in countryside? What are the problems of this issue? What can be done to solve this problem? v. 2
The issue of migration from the countryside to cities and town by an adult, is being commonly observed. This essay will cover two areas: problems of this issue, which consist of not only bonding between grandparents and child, but also grandparents left alone; and its solutions, which include regular visit from adult to their parent and provide a caretaker for them. To start with, There are various reasons why individuals left their home in the countryside and move to cities and town, many problems occurs due to this. Firstly, Children not able to connect with their grandparents. To explain, children only able to make bond, whom they stay with and when people move to town they somehow forgot their grandparents. According to an article from The Times of India, more than 70 percent of children do not remember their grandparent's name and have no bonding with them either. Another issue is, old people who live in the countryside, they left alone because their children move to cities due to this they become helpless and not even able to do the daily household work. To Illustrate with an example, According to an article from The Times of India, more than 70 percent of children do not remember their grandparents name and 40 percent of old people not able to perform daily routine work. However, young people can solve these problems with simple efforts. To begin with, they can visit their parents regularly and result of theses, children can spend time with their grandparents. The more they meet, more they get to know each other, which helps to build a strong bond between them. For example, A recent study from the Kurukshetra university shows children visit their grandparents on a regular basis are more connecting with them as compared to children who rarely visits them. Finally, Old people are not able to do daily household work, People can provide some support to them via keeping a caretaker to help them in daily routine tasks. To explain with an example, A research paper from the Harward university shows more than 70 percent of older people seeking help from someone in their routine works. To conclude, Adult people migrate to cities and town from the countryside are the reason of many problems which are bonding of their children with their grandparents and parents left alone, but those issues can be easily solved with regular visit to them and providing some support which can help them in daily routine work.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
of migration from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
to
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cities
and
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town
by an adult, is being
commonly
observed. This essay will cover two areas:
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problems
of this
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issue
, which consist of not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
bonding between
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grandparents
and child,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
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grandparents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
alone; and its solutions, which include regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
from adult to their parent and provide a caretaker for them.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, There are various reasons why individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
their home in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
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cities
and
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town
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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problems
occurs due to this.
Firstly
,
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Children
not
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able
to connect with their
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grandparents
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
,
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children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
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able
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
bond, whom they stay with and when
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
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town
they somehow forgot their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
. According to an article from The Times of India, more than 70
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do not remember their grandparent's name and have no bonding with them either. Another
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issue
is,
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old
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people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the
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countryside
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
alone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their
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children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
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cities
due to this they become helpless and not even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to do the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
household work. To Illustrate with an example, According to an article from The Times of India, more than 70
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do not remember their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
name and 40
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
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people
not
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able
to perform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routine
work.

However
, young
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people
can solve these
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problems
with simple efforts. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, they can
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visit
their parents
regularly
and result of theses,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can spend time with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
. The more they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
, more they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know each other, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to build a strong bond between them.
For example
, A recent study from the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kurukshetra
university
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
on a regular basis are more connecting with them as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who rarely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visits
them.
Finally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Old
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people
are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
household work,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
support to them via keeping a caretaker to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routine
tasks. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
with an example, A research paper from the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Harward
university
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
more than 70
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percent
of older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
seeking
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help
from someone in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routine
works.

To conclude
, Adult
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people
migrate to
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cities
and
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town
from the
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countryside
are the reason of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
which are bonding of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grandparents
and parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
alone,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
can be
easily
solved with regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
to them and providing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
support which can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routine
work.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
72Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can; there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.
Sarah Caldwell

IELTS essay Some young people are leaving countryside to live in cities and towns, leaving only old people in countryside? What are the problems of this issue? What can be done to solve this problem? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
415 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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