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University is useful for future career? to what extent do you agree? v.1

University is useful for future career? v. 1
The entire world is developing at high race and there are so many factors that are credited for this development. University study is also can be credited with so many benefits of the bright future of every student. I strongly advocate this statement and I will proceed with strong evidence about this fact before reaching to a plausible conclusion. To begin, Education plays a pivotal role in every individual’s life. It helped to humans for being a civilized person from a wild creature. In the beginning, the education system was not too strong to provide perfect knowledge to pupils around the world, but as time being passed every field of study is developing more in terms of learning. Universities also show great improvements in the education field. Moreover, there are thousands of university‘s grounds in these days, which are trying their best to develop all the nations. University education has myriads of benefits in the every course of action of students. It helps to attain the high-grade knowledge which helps them for the whole life. Students can study in different sectors and they can choose fields of their choice. Moreover, in universities practical study also provided which enhances the experience of their subject. Furthermore, student can get white collared jobs or can start his or her own business after receiving the degree of study. In the capsulation, Universities have become a backbone of the unique education system. Governments should implement new innovation to improve them for the bright future of every nation.
The entire world is developing at high race and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors that
are credited
for this development.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is
also
can
be credited
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits of the bright future of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
. I
strongly
advocate this statement and I will proceed with strong evidence about this fact
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
reaching to a plausible conclusion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
plays a pivotal role in every individual’s life. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to humans for being a civilized person from a wild creature. In the beginning, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
system was not too strong to provide perfect knowledge to pupils around the world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
as time
being passed
every field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is developing more in terms of learning.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
great improvements in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
field.
Moreover
, there are thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university‘s
grounds in these days, which are trying their best to develop all the nations.

University
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has myriads of benefits in the every course of action of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to attain the high-grade knowledge which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them for the whole life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
sectors and
they can choose fields of their choice.
Moreover
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
also
provided which enhances the experience of their subject.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
white collared jobs or can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
business after receiving the degree of study.

In the
Possible spelling mistake found.
capsulation
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
have become a backbone of the unique
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
system.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
should implement new innovation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
them for the bright future of every nation.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay University is useful for future career? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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