Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Tpo18- Q2Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is important to learn about other cultures. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v.1

Tpo18- Q2 It is important to learn about other cultures. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v. 1
Parents play a major role in the overall development of children. There is an ongoing debate in society regarding the time parents devote for their kids in assisting with homework. I strongly believe in the given statement and this essay will justify the reasons below. First of all, homework is the best way for parents to better understand their children's strength and weaknesses. Therefore, parents easily identify where children are lacking in completing tasks and assist them accordingly. As a result, kids are able to perform better or having advantages in gaining confidence which leads to a healthy relationship between them. According to a recent research, kids who received help from parents in their homework, have a strong lifelong bond. Consequently, family time is pivotal to teach children, by giving them a chance to do things for themselves, under parents supervision. Secondly, huge amount of cost is being saved by parents as their offsprings don't require any extra classes. As many kids attend tutorial classes either to gain extra knowledge or aim of keeping up with the courses they have learnt in class. With the help of parents, extra classes are no longer necessary and family expenses are reduced. A recent study concluded that children who received guidance from parents are more independent and critical thinking as compared to kids who attend tutoring classes. Similarly, kids instead of going to tuition classes they can lavish their pace for other useful activities. To conclude, parent's quality hour are imperative for adolescent in their educational journey. The reason is clear from my perspective that it's not only gains in improving bond, but also benefit in significantly reducing cost.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
play a major role in the
overall
development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. There is an ongoing debate in society regarding the time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
devote for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
in assisting with homework. I
strongly
believe in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement and this essay will justify the reasons below.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, homework is the best way for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to better understand their children's strength and weaknesses.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
easily
identify where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are lacking in completing tasks and assist them
accordingly
.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
are able to perform better or having advantages in gaining confidence which leads to a healthy relationship between them. According to a recent research,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
who received
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
in their homework, have a strong lifelong bond.
Consequently
, family time is pivotal to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, by giving them a chance to do things for themselves, under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
supervision.

Secondly
, huge amount of cost is
being saved
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
as their
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
don't require any extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
. As
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
attend tutorial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
either to gain extra knowledge or aim of keeping up with the courses they have
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
are no longer necessary and family expenses are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. A recent study concluded that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who received guidance from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are more independent and critical thinking as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
who attend tutoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
.
Similarly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
instead
of going to tuition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
they can lavish their pace for other useful activities.

To conclude
, parent's quality hour are imperative for adolescent in their educational journey. The reason is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
from my perspective that it's not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
gains in improving bond,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
benefit in
significantly
reducing cost.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Tpo18- Q2 It is important to learn about other cultures. Use details and examples to explain your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts