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TPO11- some people think that children should be allowed to watch whatever television program they choose to. Others think that parents should exercise control over the television program their children watch. v.1

TPO11- some people think that children should be allowed to watch whatever television program they choose to. Others think that parents should exercise control over the television program their children watch. v. 1
Consumer goods have become the most important part of people’s life. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? Consumer goods have become the mainstay of people’s living.  This essay is an attempt to study the advantages and disadvantages and provide a conclusion. In today’s fast paced world, consumer goods are a boon to humanity.  Firstly, they are available in all categories ranging from automobiles, furniture, household appliances etc.  While they make life easy and comfortable, they do not cost an arm and a leg and are generally affordable.  For instance, one can cook up a pre cooked meal to satisfy hunger or reach any far off place in no time by taking a vehicle or perform all household chores such as laundry, dish cleaning, sweeping and mopping at the click of a button of the washing machine, dish cleaner, and vacuum cleaner respectively.  Hence, this definitely leaves some room for an individual to pursue their hobbies or passions, which leads to better living standards. However, consumer goods have their drawbacks as well.   This results in obesity and other ailments such as cardiac problems, diabetes, joint aches, respiratory issues etc. This isolation is known to cause depression tendencies in individuals.  Excessive usage of automobiles is fast depleting our natural resources such as petrol, diesel and adding to the existing pollution levels. It would be prudent to say that while consumer goods still continue to be a boon to mankind, its usage should be regulated and monitored on an individual and government level to ensure it continues to be a boon and not a bane.
Consumer
goods
have become the most
important
part of
people
’s life. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Consumer
goods
have become the mainstay of
people
’s living.  This essay is an attempt to study the advantages and disadvantages and provide a conclusion.

In
today
’s
fast
paced world,
consumer
goods
are a boon to humanity.  
Firstly
, they are available in all categories ranging from automobiles, furniture, household appliances etc.
 
While they
make
life easy and comfortable, they do not cost an arm and a leg and are
generally
affordable.  
For instance
, one can cook up a
pre
cooked meal to satisfy hunger or reach any far off place in no time by taking a vehicle or perform all household chores such as laundry, dish cleaning, sweeping and mopping at the click of a button of the washing machine, dish cleaner, and vacuum cleaner
respectively
.  
Hence
, this definitely
leaves
some
room for an individual to pursue their hobbies or passions, which leads to better living standards.

However
,
consumer
goods
have their drawbacks
as well
.
 
This results in obesity and other ailments such as cardiac problems, diabetes, joint aches, respiratory issues etc.

This isolation
is known
to cause depression tendencies in individuals.  Excessive usage of automobiles is
fast
depleting our natural resources such as petrol, diesel and adding to the existing pollution levels.

It would be prudent to say that while
consumer
goods
still
continue to be a boon to mankind, its usage should
be regulated
and monitored on an individual and
government
level to ensure it continues to be a boon and not a bane.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO11- some people think that children should be allowed to watch whatever television program they choose to. Others think that parents should exercise control over the television program their children watch. v. 1

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
263 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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