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TPO 23 - Question 1There can be several advantages to spending time living in another country. Talk about one advantage and explain how living in another country provides that advantage. Use details and examples in your response. v.1

TPO 23 - Question 1There can be several advantages to spending time living in another country. Talk about one advantage and explain how living in another country provides that advantage. Use details and examples in your response. v. 1
Tourism has always played a vital role in the economy of the nation. Attracting tourists all round the globe has always been a top most priority of each and every country. In fact, attracting tourists has now emerged as a way of commercial aspects. I truly believe tourism as an opportunity in promoting a country. Globalisation has led to the integration of various countries, organisations and has risen as a platform for tourism. On the other hand, it has resulted in an exchange of culture and has risen as a means of commercialisation. Tourism has started to emerge as a small scale business for the local people and has other benefits such as exchange of ideas. For example, people travelling to various countries love to take memories of the place with them and hence, they buy souvenirs which benefit the local people. People these days have started to spend money on memories, rather than spending it on things. Hence, every nation is spending a hefty fee on their monuments and other tourist places so that tourists get attracted towards it. The flow of tourists in the country is ultimately leading to a steady rise in the economy. Various nations spend a huge amount of money on advertisement of their country, and eventually try to attract tourists. For instance, many countries have tried to promote tourism by providing visa on arrival and hence leading people to deal with less appointments in the visa procedure. To summarize, tourism should be seen as a major opportunity and hence should be given prior attention. Tourists should be treated as guests and no void should be left in their hospitality. Tourism is going to play a major role in the days to come, so its better we use is at as a chance to enhance our country.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
has always played a vital role in the economy of the nation. Attracting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
all round the globe has always been a top most priority of each and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In fact, attracting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
emerged as a way of commercial aspects. I
truly
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
as an opportunity in promoting a country.

Possible spelling mistake. 'Globalisation' is British English.
Globalisation
has led to the integration of various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
and has risen as a platform for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
.
On the other hand
, it has resulted in an exchange of culture and has risen as a means of
Possible spelling mistake. 'commercialisation' is British English.
commercialisation
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to emerge as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
scale business for the local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and has other benefits such as exchange of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
.
For example
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
travelling to various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to take memories of the place with them and
hence
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
souvenirs which benefit the local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
these days have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to spend money on memories,
rather
than spending it on things.
Hence
, every nation is spending a hefty fee on their monuments and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
places
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attracted towards it. The flow of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is
ultimately
leading to a steady rise in the economy. Various nations spend a huge amount of money on
The usual collocation for "advertisement" is "for" not "of". Did you mean "advertisement for"?
advertisement of
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, and
eventually
try to attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have tried to promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
by providing visa on arrival and
hence
leading
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to deal with
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun appointments is countable.
less
appointments in the visa procedure.

To summarize
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as a major opportunity and
hence
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
prior attention.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourists
should
be treated
as guests and no void should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
in their hospitality.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
is going to play a major role in the days to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
its better we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
is at as a chance to enhance our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 23 - Question 1There can be several advantages to spending time living in another country. Talk about one advantage and explain how living in another country provides that advantage. Use details and examples in your response. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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