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TPO 11- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Some people say that the Internet provides people with a lot of valuable information. Others think access to much information creates problems. Which view do you agree with? Use specific reason v.2

TPO 11- Some people say that the Internet provides people with a lot of valuable information. Others think access to much information creates problems. Which view do you agree with? Use specific reason v. 2
In the current century, the internet plays a pivotal role in the advancement and improvement of several fields of science and engineering. Besides, the internet has become a magic word for almost every requirement in our daily life. When it comes to positive or negative effects of using the internet, controversy surrounds the issue of whether people get valuable help or this excessive exposure to the internet may create several problems? I am of the opinion that the internet has many benefits which weigh its drawbacks and the following explanations will further elaborate on this matter. One of the significant aspects of the ongoing topic which demands a keen contemplation is that the internet paves the way for rapid scientific research investigation. That is to say, in the past, people did not have easy access to the knowledge sources. In fact, they accumulate the knowledge by exchanging their textbooks, spending hours in the libraries, or even in some necessary cases, they may have gotten information by face to face communication. Meanwhile, the advent of the internet facilitates the way of getting the required data by e-books, online libraries, or search engines in less time. Thus, scholars, today can create and work better in comparison to the past by just sitting on their desks. Take my own experience for instance. I went to the high school in the 80' s and there was no internet connection in our country. Thus, we had difficulty finding our questions or solving or problems by ourselves. But today my son checks his problems by using the internet without any problem. Another noteworthy aspect of the topic which needs to be reflected is that the internet eases the lifestyle of the people. As a matter of fact, it provides a great connection for online purchasing and several shopping places. Thus, people do not need to spend their time by going to the markets or checking prices in stores to find the best price for their items. To illustrate, perhaps my cousin' s experience will shed more light on this matter. He bought his car by just checking and paying online. He told me that online websites gave him a great chance to get rid of the stressful bargaining procedure and also he could evaluate different options and prices for the same car in the related sites. Owing to this positive feedback, he firmly suggested this type of purchasing to me. Paradoxically, some people may spend their time to check the political and social occurrences and this habit may create an addiction in a long term. In essence, the sedentary lifestyle can lead to unpreventable causes of health diseases like anxiety, depression, and obesity. This happens mainly because of not having vigorous physical exercise to activate the body. On the basis of the points mentioned above, I am pretty convinced that there are many tangible reasons to support the advantage of using the internet in our life. Because the internet can help scholars for a swift access to the required data and also it eases people' s lifestyle in a good way. However, the excessive use of it can negatively affect the health of the people.
In the
current
century, the internet plays a pivotal role in the advancement and improvement of several fields of science and engineering.
Besides
, the internet has become a magic word for almost every requirement in our daily life. When it
comes
to
positive
or
negative
effects of using the internet, controversy surrounds the issue of whether
people
get
valuable
help
or this excessive exposure to the internet may create several problems? I am of the opinion that the internet has
many
benefits which weigh its drawbacks and the following explanations will
further
elaborate on this matter.

One of the significant aspects of the ongoing topic which demands a keen contemplation is that the internet paves the way for rapid scientific research investigation.
That is
to say, in the past,
people
did not have easy access to the knowledge sources. In fact, they accumulate the knowledge by exchanging their textbooks, spending hours in the libraries, or even in
some
necessary cases, they may have gotten information by face to face communication. Meanwhile, the advent of the internet facilitates the way of getting the required data by e-books,
online
libraries, or search engines in less time.
Thus
, scholars,
today
can create and work better
in comparison
to the past by
just
sitting on their desks. Take my
own
experience
for instance
. I went to the high school in the 80' s and there was no internet connection in our country.
Thus
, we had difficulty finding our questions or solving or problems by ourselves.
But
today
my son
checks
his problems by using the internet without any problem.

Another noteworthy aspect of the topic which needs to
be reflected
is that the internet
eases
the lifestyle of the
people
. As a matter of fact, it provides a great connection for
online
purchasing and several shopping places.
Thus
,
people
do not need to spend their time by going to the markets or checking prices in stores to find the best price for their items. To illustrate, perhaps my
cousin&
#039; s experience will shed more light on this matter. He
bought
his car by
just
checking and paying
online
. He
told
me that
online
websites gave him a great chance to
get
rid of the stressful bargaining procedure and
also
he could evaluate
different
options and prices for the same car in the related sites. Owing to this
positive
feedback, he
firmly
suggested this type of purchasing to me.

Paradoxically
,
some
people
may spend their time to
check
the political and social occurrences and this habit may create an addiction in a long term. In essence, the sedentary lifestyle can lead to unpreventable causes of health diseases like anxiety, depression, and obesity. This happens
mainly
because
of not having vigorous physical exercise to activate the body.

On the basis of the points mentioned above, I am pretty convinced that there are
many
tangible reasons to support the advantage of using the internet in our life.
Because
the internet can
help
scholars for
a swift access
to the required data and
also
it
eases
people&
#039; s lifestyle in a
good
way.
However
, the excessive
use
of it can
negatively
affect the health of the
people
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 11- Some people say that the Internet provides people with a lot of valuable information. Others think access to much information creates problems. Which view do you agree with? Use specific reason v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
529 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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