Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

tpo 1 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. Use specific reasons and examples to support y v.1

tpo 1 At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. Use specific reasons and examples to support y v. 1
It has been widely seen some individuals work for the same company in their whole career. However, others believe that it is beneficial to work for various corporations. Apparently, there are pros and cons for both sides. This essay will analyze the principal reasons for these perceptions and will provide a logical conclusion. To begin with, an individual can enjoy many benefits if he works for several organizations and the first one is professional progress. If a candidate can able to negotiate packages and roles, that person can achieve a high-level position. For example, there are very few employees turn over in fortune 500 companies such as JP Morgan, Boeing, Airbus. This situation creates employee bottlenecks and quite often an organization can not promote an employee to the next position. As a result, professional growth is quite steady in the same company. Nevertheless, frequent job change can downward the employment progress. A new joiner often cannot adopt the new environment due to a lack of camaraderie with colleagues and peers as well as hidden corporate politics. For example, recent HR research shows companies willing to downsize if an employee cannot collaborate well in a team environment. This indicates how crucial the new work environment is for career progression. So, regular job changes do not bring well beings in the career success graph. Finally, someone can easily portray that continues job changes can bring loss for an individual and the organization. I firmly believe employees should not be more focus on their responsibilities and should not leave a company.
It has been
widely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
in their whole career.
However
, others believe that it is beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for various corporations.
Apparently
, there are pros and cons for both sides. This essay will analyze the principal reasons for these perceptions and will provide a logical conclusion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, an individual can enjoy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits if he works for several organizations and the
first
one is professional progress. If a candidate
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
can able to
negotiate packages and roles, that person can achieve a high-level position.
For example
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
turn over in
If the term is a proper noun, use the suggested capitalization.
fortune 500
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
such as JP Morgan, Boeing, Airbus. This situation creates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
bottlenecks and quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
an organization can not promote an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
to the
next
position.
As a result
, professional growth is quite steady in the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

Nevertheless
, frequent job
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
can downward the employment progress. A new joiner
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
cannot adopt the new environment due to a lack of camaraderie with colleagues and peers
as well
as hidden corporate politics.
For example
, recent HR research
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
willing to downsize if an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
cannot collaborate well in a team environment. This indicates how crucial the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
environment is for career progression.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, regular job
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
do not bring well beings in the career success graph.

Finally
, someone can
easily
portray that continues job
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
can bring loss for an individual and the organization. I
firmly
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
should not be more focus on their responsibilities and should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay tpo 1 At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. Use specific reasons and examples to support y v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts