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Tourism is an ever growing industry. what benefit do you think tourism brings to individuals and society? v.4

Tourism is an ever growing industry. what benefit do you think tourism brings to individuals and society? v. 4
Touring around the world have become a popular choice among the people. While tourists are beneficial to the people, this can also reflect its positivity on the society as well. In this essay I will discuss how tourism can contribute to the development of the society and its dwellers. The main positive impact of tourism is, it broadens horizons for job opportunities to the local people. This happens when a lot of tourists visits to the particular place they need services, which can make their trip hurdle-free. For example, If tourists arrive at an unknown place to explore, they might need various services like drivers, accommodations, guides and restaurants. As a result, the dweller of the famous tourist places can have more job options in tourism sector in order to meet the demands of the visitors. The benefit of tourism is not only limited to local people it has a great impact on the society as well. This means it will boost the economy through foreign exchange, which helps the economy to grow further. For example, if people come to visit a place, they spend a lot of money on air tickets, which helps to uplift the economy of that country. Therefore, many countries are generating financial resources, through tourism as it potentially develops the economic conditions. In conclusion, Although tourists are beneficial to the public as they require various services resulting more job pathways to the local people in tourism industry, it also profoundly contribute extra income to the countries monetary funds because they spend huge amounts while travelling.
Touring around the world have become a popular choice among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
are beneficial to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, this can
also
reflect its positivity on the society
as well
.

In this essay I will discuss how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
can contribute to the development of the society and its dwellers.

The main
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is, it broadens horizons for job opportunities to the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This happens when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
visits to the particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
they need services, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their trip hurdle-free.
For example
, If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
arrive at an unknown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
to explore, they might need various services like drivers, accommodations, guides and restaurants.
As a result
, the dweller of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
can have more job options in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
sector in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the demands of the visitors.

The benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
limited to local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
it has a great impact on the society
as well
. This means it will boost the economy through foreign exchange, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the economy to grow
further
.
For example
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to visit a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
, they spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money on air tickets, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to uplift the economy of that country.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries are generating financial resources, through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
as it
potentially
develops the economic conditions.

In conclusion
, Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
are beneficial to the public as they require various services resulting more job pathways to the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
industry, it
also
profoundly
contribute extra income to the countries monetary funds
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they spend huge amounts while travelling.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Tourism is an ever growing industry. what benefit do you think tourism brings to individuals and society? v. 4

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
260 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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