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Tourism is a valuable business for many countries and can bring them many benefits, but it can also cause damage to local communities. discuss the arguments on both sides of the issue. what is your opinion on the matter? Give reasons for your answer and in v.1

Tourism is a valuable business for many countries and can bring them many benefits, but it can also cause damage to local communities. discuss the arguments on both sides of the issue. what is your opinion on the matter? 1
In the recent years, modern communication has become very popular and widely used and so others believe that writing letters now is unnecessary. In my opinion, I disagree that communicating through letters is not essential anymore as it brings positive effects to the people. A good reason why writing letters is still significant today is that it brings joy to a lot of individuals, especially during special occasions. An example would be invitation letters for a wedding. Friends who receive this kind of writing get thrilled and excited for they can see the colours and the theme of the occasion through the mailed invitation. Others also prefer receiving gifts with cards on their birthdays to note who gave them that present, reminding themselves of their friendship towards people. This then makes special occasions, even better as it becomes very memorable and extraordinary. Another reason to keep writing letters is safety. Communication corruptions, such as wire taping, are now happening in the society, threatening many with regards to their conversation privacy. There are a lot of reports lately that the recording of their private calls is being exposed to the internet, making them feel uneasy about conversing on the phone. And so, others still prefer writing letters, most especially in transferring value data. By doing so, they feel more secure with handing their information, knowing that it will not be recorded, lowering the risk of exposure. In conclusion, the art of writing letters remains significant in the presence of the present mode of communication for it brings happiness and a sense of security to people.
In the recent years, modern communication has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular and
widely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
is unnecessary. In my opinion, I disagree that communicating through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
is not essential anymore as it brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
is
still
significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is that it brings joy to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
individuals,
especially
during special occasions. An example would be invitation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
for a wedding. Friends who receive this kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
thrilled and excited for they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.
colours
and the theme of the occasion through the mailed invitation. Others
also
prefer receiving gifts with cards on their birthdays to note who gave them that present, reminding themselves of their friendship towards
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. This then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
special occasions, even better as it becomes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
memorable and extraordinary.

Another reason to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
is safety. Communication corruptions, such as wire taping, are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
happening in the society, threatening
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
with regards to
their conversation privacy. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
reports lately that the recording of their private calls is
being exposed
to the internet, making them feel uneasy about conversing on the phone. And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, others
still
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
, most
especially
in transferring value data. By doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they feel more secure with handing their information, knowing that it will not
be recorded
, lowering the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of exposure.

In conclusion
, the art of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
letters
remains significant in the presence of the present mode of communication for it brings happiness and a sense of security to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
The conquest of learning is achieved through the knowledge of languages.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Tourism is a valuable business for many countries and can bring them many benefits, but it can also cause damage to local communities. discuss the arguments on both sides of the issue. what is your opinion on the matter? 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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