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TOPIC: the widespread use of the Internet has brought many problems. What do you think are the main problems associated with the use of the web? What solutions can you suggest? v.2

TOPIC: the widespread use of the Internet has brought many problems. What do you think are the main problems associated with the use of the web? What solutions can you suggest? v. 2
As we all know that since the start of internet usage it has evolved a lot. More and more utilization of networking and the internet has become common among the nations for every purpose, whether it could be communication or data storage, the internet is serving all the purposes. However, consequences are alongside this are unavoidable. This essay will discuss the issues and suggest proper solutions to curb this issue. Increased use of the web and its services could result in a lack of physical contact and emotions. As the internet has taken the lives of people at its control, it is hard to believe that more than 90% of the public using the internet these days. which is an enormous amount and main usages are recorded as mobile devices and computers which bring health issues such as migraine, diminishing of vision, carpal tunnel syndrome due to continuous use of the mouse. Although these problems are not acute they get serious with time. Besides this there is insecureness, no one has the idea that who is spying on them, The Internet is like an ocean where anyone could possibly read other messages with simple hacks. On the contrary, safe and secure use of the internet could benefit us in many ways. Using private internet sources and firewalls could prevent us from unknown web attacks. It' s always safe to avoid public wifi and access points. Using parental controls will help on restricting particular sites that children should not browse for. A survey conducted in New York has revealed that more than 70 % of users are depending on public served wifi or sources to utilize in their daily lives, which is why they are more prone to hackers and losing their data. This could be prevented by using VPN or firewall protections which could help us fighting such attacks. To conclude, although there are many uses of web and internet they are not profitable unless used in a proper manner. It has its up' s and down' s and it' s our responsibility to maintain its balance.
As we all know that since the
start
of internet usage it has evolved a lot. More and more utilization of networking and the internet has become common among the nations for every purpose, whether it could be communication or data storage, the internet is serving all the purposes.
However
, consequences are alongside this are unavoidable. This essay will discuss the issues and suggest proper solutions to curb this issue.

Increased
use
of the web and its services could result in a lack of physical contact and emotions. As the internet has taken the
lives
of
people
at its control, it is
hard
to believe that more than 90% of the public using the internet these days.
which
is an enormous amount and main usages
are recorded
as mobile devices and computers which bring health issues such as migraine, diminishing of vision, carpal tunnel syndrome due to continuous
use
of the mouse.
Although
these problems are not acute they
get
serious with time.
Besides
this there is
insecureness
, no one has the
idea
that who is spying on them, The Internet is like an ocean where anyone could
possibly
read other messages with simple hacks.

On the contrary
, safe and secure
use
of the internet could benefit us in
many
ways. Using private internet sources and firewalls could
prevent
us from unknown web attacks.
It&
#039; s always safe to avoid public
wifi
and access points. Using parental controls will
help
on restricting particular sites that children should not browse for. A survey conducted in New York has revealed that more than 70 % of users
are depending
on public served
wifi
or sources to utilize in their daily
lives
, which is why they are more prone to hackers and losing their data. This could be
prevented
by using VPN or firewall protections which could
help
us
fighting
such attacks.

To conclude
, although there are
many
uses
of web and internet they are not profitable unless
used
in a proper manner
. It has its
up&
#039; s and
down&
#039; s and
it&
#039; s our responsibility to maintain its balance.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Mistakes

IELTS essay TOPIC: the widespread use of the Internet has brought many problems. What do you think are the main problems associated with the use of the web? What solutions can you suggest? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
347 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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