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Topic: Some people believe online reading material should be used for a child to learn to read whereas others believe only printed materials should be used. Discuss both views and give your opinion? v.1

Topic: Some people believe online reading material should be used for a child to learn to read whereas others believe only printed materials should be used. v. 1
Although, people have different thoughts that e-learning material is convenient for teenagers to study, while few things only paper-based material is sufficient for a junior. In my opinion, I considered that hard-copy material would develop a scholar's cognitive, lateral and comprehensive skills. Printout is a supplement to enhance children's self-studies. In fact, these are an immense source of knowledge; for academic students, incorporation of pictures, diagrams, and graphs helps in guided learning. This material is a vital factor to assimilate knowledge. In 2012 a researcher at Indiana University showed that reading from a hard copy allows better concentration rather than the digital one. Additionally, paper-led material encourages the child to read a lot, and likewise it would increase understanding and rote learning power. Recent data published shows that school students have more capability to organize their goal in marshal facts then university students which rely on soft copies. Thus, hard copies enhance self-confidence, autonomous learning and data gathering expertise of a student. In contrast, the effect of e-Learning material has had innumerable issues with children's health. These computers and electronic devices emit harmful radiation, which leads to loss of vision and headaches. Although the ebooks are convenient, flexible and cost-effective, they are more time-consuming than traditional printouts. A recent inspection shows that youngsters who do self learning through soft copies will take more time to understand the absence of traditional books. Moreover, these internet-based materials require time management skills and also create a sense of isolation for a student. For example, a 2013 research from Cambridge University shows that 62% of e-books learners fail to complete the task on a timeline and also suffer from mental depression. In conclusion, while people may vary in their opinions, I think it would be better students ought to prefer a traditional material as it strengthens self investigation skills and shifts information. In spite of several devastating limitations of computer-based material.
Although,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
thoughts that e-learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
is convenient for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
to study, while few things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
paper-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
is sufficient for a junior. In my opinion, I considered that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
-copy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
would develop a scholar's cognitive, lateral and comprehensive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

Printout is a supplement to enhance children's self-studies. In fact, these are an immense source of knowledge; for academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, incorporation of pictures, diagrams, and graphs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in guided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
is a vital factor to assimilate knowledge. In 2012 a researcher at Indiana University
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that reading from a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
copy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
better concentration
rather
than the digital one.
Additionally
, paper-led
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
encourages the child to read a lot, and
likewise
it would increase understanding and rote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
power. Recent data published
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have more capability to organize their goal in marshal facts then university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
which rely on soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
copies
.
Thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
copies
enhance self-confidence, autonomous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
and data gathering expertise of a student.

In contrast
, the effect of e-Learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
has had innumerable issues with children's health. These computers and electronic devices emit harmful radiation, which leads to loss of vision and headaches. Although the
Possible spelling mistake found.
ebooks
are convenient, flexible and cost-effective, they are more time-consuming than traditional printouts. A recent inspection
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that youngsters who do self
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
through soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
copies
will take more time to understand the absence of traditional books.
Moreover
, these internet-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
materials
require time management
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
also
create a sense of isolation for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
.
For example
, a 2013 research from Cambridge University
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that 62% of e-books learners fail to complete the task on a timeline and
also
suffer from mental depression.

In conclusion
, while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may vary in their opinions, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it would be better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
ought to prefer a traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
as it strengthens self investigation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and shifts information.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
several devastating limitations of computer-based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Topic: Some people believe online reading material should be used for a child to learn to read whereas others believe only printed materials should be used. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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