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Topic: Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive developments. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree? There is an increasingly growi v.1

Topic: Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive developments. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and society. There is an increasingly growi v. 1
Salary is one of the most important factors for any job. Salaries are basically the amount of money or compensation paid to an employee by an employer in return for work performed. This is infect not only the payment of the work, but also act as big and most important motivator. Highly skilled performers earn higher wages than low skilled ones. So there are always income divisions among people. However, this is necessary to have different income class of different people of different ability, in my opinion, the gap between high and low salary should be reduced. Firstly, if the wage difference can be minimized than all can get an almost equal opportunity for quality training. We all know that good standard learning has become expensive. People with higher salary level can effort it. But on the other hand, those people whose wage are low cannot get tuition of a higher standard. If we are able to reduce earning inequality, than the change of getting a good standard education among all the people will increase. Secondly, higher pay groups enjoy a good standard of living, including hygienic environment and good medical care. On the other hand, people with poor wage often have to live in unhealthy circumstances. As a result very often they become sick and also cannot get good treatment. The reduced earnings difference income difference will shorten the gap between living standard, resulting good nursing, quality education, the opportunity to live in a clean and healthy environment. In conclusion, although it is not possible to remove inequality of wages, but by decrease income gap we can ensure standard living of all of the members of our society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Salary
is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factors for any job.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Salaries
are
basically
the amount of money or compensation paid to an employee by an employer in return for work performed. This is
Consider using a past participle here: "infected".
infect
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the payment of the work,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
act as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
and most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
motivator.
Highly
skilled performers earn higher wages than low skilled ones.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
there are always
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
divisions among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
However
, this is necessary to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ability, in my opinion, the gap between high and low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.

Firstly
, if the wage difference can
be minimized
than all can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an almost equal opportunity for quality training. We all know that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
learning has become expensive.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
with higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
level can effort it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
on the other hand
, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
whose wage are low cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tuition of a higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
. If we are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
earning inequality,
Did you mean "then"?
than
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
of getting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
education among all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will increase.

Secondly
, higher pay groups enjoy a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
of living, including hygienic environment and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
medical care.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with poor wage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in unhealthy circumstances.
As a result
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
they become sick and
also
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
treatment. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
earnings difference
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
difference will shorten the gap between living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
, resulting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
nursing, quality education, the opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a clean and healthy environment.

In conclusion
, although it is not possible to remove inequality of wages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
gap we can ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
living of
Consider using "all the".
all of the
members of our society.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Topic: Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive developments. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and society. There is an increasingly growi v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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