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Today's teenagers have more stressful lives than previous generations. v.4

Today's teenagers have more stressful lives than previous generations. v. 4
Today’s teenagers are facing more stress than ever before, and it has been also observed that young people suffer more stress than the last generations, as they live in the world of technology and advancement. People will think to survive in today's world, they should be aware of modern technology. I strongly believe that young people live a stressful life that teenagers are exposed to more products than earlier generations as a result of living in a modern consumer society. This could be observed for the development of the social network as the appearance of many addictive things where they don't think about anything except it which leads to a boring and lifeless life, but at the same time, it can be helpful due to how teenagers use it. On the other hand, pressures at school are stronger than before. To achieve the lifestyle teenagers must succeed in their studies, so they can enter the best jobs. As examinations and Homeworks are being more stressful and this increases the level of strain. Nowadays teenagers spend most of their time on unnecessary things that cause strength among young people, but usually, teenagers do a lot of useful and useless things, for example, when their day is not spent well in terms of useful things, then you go for analysis at night and take a deep thought process which leads to depression. In conclusion, the modern-day teenager feels more strain due to stress, and I believe that these tensions were also found in older times but they have become more powerful currently.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
are facing more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, and it has been
also
observed that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suffer more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
than the last generations, as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the world of technology and advancement.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to survive in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world, they should be aware of modern technology.

I
strongly
believe that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a stressful life that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
are exposed
to more products than earlier generations
as a result
of living in a modern consumer society. This could
be observed
for the development of the social network as the appearance of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
addictive things where they don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about anything except it which leads to a boring and lifeless life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
at the same time, it can be helpful due to how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it.

On the other hand
, pressures at school are stronger than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. To achieve the lifestyle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
succeed in their studies,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can enter the best jobs. As examinations and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Homeworks
are being more stressful and this increases the level of strain. Nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
spend most of their time on unnecessary things that cause strength among young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
usually
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
useful and useless things,
for example
, when their day is not spent well in terms of useful things, then you go for analysis at night and take a deep
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
process which leads to depression.

In conclusion
, the modern-day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenager
feels more strain due to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, and I believe that these tensions were
also
found in older times
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they have become more powerful
currently
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Today's teenagers have more stressful lives than previous generations. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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