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Today much of the food people eat gets transported from farms that are thousands of miles away. Some people believe it would be better for the environment and the economy if people only consumed food produced by local farmers. Would the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v.7

Today much of the food people eat gets transported from farms that are thousands of miles away. Some people believe it would be better for the environment and the economy if people only consumed food produced by local farmers. Would the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 7
When people purchase food products, they may face the dilemma of whether to consume locally-produced foods, or imported from far-away farms. While only consuming food produced locally brings some benefits for the environment and the economy, excluding food from other areas is not a wise idea. On the one hand, there are several benefits of eating food produced by local farmers only. Admittedly, consuming local food products could contribute to protecting the environment. Purchasing locally manufactured food means there may be fewer uses of long-distance transportations or chemicals to maintain flavours of the food. Therefore, less toxic emissions from transporting vehicles or food preservation chemicals release into the atmosphere, which results in the reduction of environmental pollution. Moreover, it would be likely to boost economic growth if more local food were consumed. When people buy more locally-produced food, they are supporting local farmers and food producers, thereby making sure they earn a sufficient living. The intensive demands for healthy and fresh food tend to create jobs for local people, which develops the local economy. Despite the advantages mentioned above, I believe that they are outweighed by the following problems. Firstly, it could narrow the variety of food when only using local food products. Many factors such as seasonal growing, climate or soil content may prohibit the growth of items in local farms, which makes some particular food do not grow worldwide. As a result, not having the diversity of food items tends to unable to satisfy the needs of customers. Secondly, accommodating regional food only could increase the number of food wasted problems. The lack of imported items makes local farmers less competitive since they are alone in the market, consequently, the food with the organic trademarks could be expensive. Costumers then seek more economical choices, which results in a colossal amount of resources being wasted. In conclusion, I firmly believe that the advantages of consuming regional food are negated by the disadvantages.
When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
products, they may face the dilemma of whether to consume
locally
-produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
, or imported from far-away farms. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
produced
locally
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits for the environment and the economy, excluding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
from other areas is not a wise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

On the one hand, there are several benefits of eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
produced by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
farmers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
.
Admittedly
, consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
products could contribute to protecting the environment. Purchasing
locally
manufactured
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
means there may be fewer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
of long-distance transportations or chemicals to maintain
Possible spelling mistake. 'flavours' is British English.
flavours
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Therefore
, less toxic emissions from transporting vehicles or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
preservation chemicals release into the atmosphere, which results in the reduction of environmental pollution.
Moreover
, it would be likely to boost economic growth if more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
were consumed
. When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
more
locally
-produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, they are supporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
farmers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
producers, thereby making sure they earn a sufficient living. The intensive demands for healthy and fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
tend to create jobs for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, which develops the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy.

Despite the advantages mentioned above, I believe that they
are outweighed
by the following problems.
Firstly
, it could narrow the variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
products.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
factors such as seasonal growing, climate or soil content may prohibit the growth of items in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
farms, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
do not grow worldwide.
As a result
, not having the diversity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items tends
Did you mean "too unable to"?
to unable to
satisfy the needs of customers.
Secondly
, accommodating regional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
could increase the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
wasted problems. The lack of imported items
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
farmers less competitive since they are alone in the market,
consequently
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
with the organic trademarks could be expensive. Costumers then seek more economical choices, which results in a colossal amount of resources
being wasted
.

In conclusion
, I
firmly
believe that the advantages of consuming regional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
are negated
by the disadvantages.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Today much of the food people eat gets transported from farms that are thousands of miles away. Some people believe it would be better for the environment and the economy if people only consumed food produced by local farmers. Would the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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