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Today more people are traveling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of traveling for the traveler? v.1

Today more people are traveling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of traveling for the traveler? v. 1
So nowadays there have been a trend of visiting different places, which was not there earlier, so what we have to see what is that and what are the main outcomes and how it helps them. So yes, there has been a trend of going abroad and visiting some places, which is because of the growing social media. Because now a days we are also mainly trying to compare our life with other that we usually see on social media and also the growing Internet era. Because of the Internet all things become very easier, like to check for the area where you want to go, like we can make booking of that venue, check for tickets online and also pre-plan the whole journey, check for the reviews about that region. Main gain, I believe, is to help persons with to match up with the social competitors that they have in the social media platforms and also there was a survey done that most of the people nowadays go on tours to put their images of tours on social media to show-off other as well that even they are visiting the places to attract attention and get likes and comments from their social media alliances. On the other hand, there are also outcomes like you get the experience of that particular place that you visit and also the knowledge of what exactly exists in the other part of the word and to admire the mother nature and admire the beautiful artificial creations as well.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
nowadays there have been a trend of visiting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, which was not there earlier,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
what we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
what is that and what are the main outcomes and how it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
yes, there has been a trend of going abroad and visiting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
Did you mean "nowadays"?
now a days
we are
also
mainly
trying to compare our life with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
that we
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and
also
the growing Internet era.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the Internet all things become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easier, like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
for the area where you want to go, like we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
booking of that venue,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
for tickets online and
also
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-plan
the whole journey,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
for the reviews about that region.

Main gain, I believe, is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
persons with to match up with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
competitors that they have in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
platforms and
also
there was a survey done that most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
nowadays go on tours to put their images of tours on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
-off
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
as well
that even they are visiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
to attract attention and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
likes and comments from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
alliances. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are
also
outcomes like you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the experience of that particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
that you visit and
also
the knowledge of what exactly exists in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
part of the word and to admire the mother nature and admire the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
artificial creations
as well
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Today more people are traveling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of traveling for the traveler? v. 1

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
254 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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