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Today more and more people are overweight than before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this. What are main affects of this epidemic. v.1

Today more and more people are overweight than before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this. What are main affects of this epidemic. v. 1
It is undoubtedly true that the numbers of obese people has increased than past when a very few people suffered with this epidemic. This essay will explain the reasons and describe its impact on a person's health and work performance. There are enormous causes of the increase amount of overweight people; however, the most important one is an inactive lifestyle. Nowadays, people totally depend on cars instead of walking even for shorter distance as well as they may not prefer to do work which demands physical efforts. This result in burning less calories and gaining weight. Moreover, consumption of ready- made has increased. Due to busy schedule, most of people consume processed food, which consists higher fat calories. Consuming higher calories on a regular basis means increasing fat in the body. I think, these are two main factors in overweight. The possible effects of this problem include health problems and loss of productivity.  Obesity results in incorrect body functioning and contribute to develop chronic diseases. For example, as body fat percentage, increase, the metabolism worsens. Which become the cause of diabetes and heart diseases. Secondly, overweight people are very unhealthy and suffer from stress and tiredness. This not only lessen their capacity, but also performance and productivity. It, for instance, has been proven that an obese person needs a lot of efforts to complete some work than person with normal weight. In conclusion, obesity has become a serious issue and many people are affected by this. I think that it mainly caused by inactive lifestyles and consumption of fast food which leads to health problems and loss of productivity.
It is
undoubtedly
true that the numbers of obese
people
has increased than past when a
very
few
people
suffered with this epidemic. This essay will
explain
the reasons and
describe
its impact on a person's health and work performance.

There are enormous causes of the increase amount of overweight
people
;
however
, the most
important
one is an inactive lifestyle. Nowadays,
people
totally
depend on cars
instead
of walking even for shorter distance
as well
as they may not prefer to do work which demands physical efforts. This result in burning
less calories
and gaining weight.
Moreover
, consumption of ready- made has increased. Due to busy schedule, most of
people
consume processed food, which consists higher
fat
calories. Consuming higher calories on a regular basis means increasing
fat
in the body. I
think
, these are two main factors in overweight.

The possible effects of this problem include health problems and loss of productivity.  Obesity results in incorrect body functioning and contribute to develop chronic diseases.
For example
, as body
fat
percentage, increase, the metabolism worsens. Which become the cause of diabetes and heart diseases.
Secondly
, overweight
people
are
very
unhealthy and suffer from
stress
and tiredness. This not
only
lessen their capacity,
but
also
performance and productivity. It,
for instance
, has
been proven
that an obese person needs
a lot of
efforts to complete
some
work than person with normal weight.

In conclusion
, obesity has become a serious issue and
many
people
are
affected
by this. I
think
that it
mainly
caused by inactive lifestyles and consumption of
fast
food which leads to health problems and loss of productivity.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Today more and more people are overweight than before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this. What are main affects of this epidemic. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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