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To some people studying the past has little value in the modern world. Why do you think it is important to learn the past? What will be the effect if children are not taught history? v.5

To some people studying the past has little value in the modern world. Why do you think it is important to learn the past? What will be the effect if children are not taught history? v. 5
Many people state that studying history has many important values in the modern life while others have an opposite view on this. In my opinion, the very purpose of the history lessons in schools is to educate students what the world was in the past and how to build a better future from the lessons the history tells us. By studying and observing history, students can learn from the past events of our past generations and their experiments, mistakes, success, dedication, lifestyle, struggling and bravery can teach us to be ready for the hardships of life beforehand. The past has always comprised of invaluable insights of great kings, thinkers and warriors like Napoleon, Nietzsche and Aschille. Examples taken from their words and actions are great source for those who are passionate about acquiring ideas and clues of how to survive and thrive. Moreover, as my country's former president Haydar A. said "the one who do not know their past do not have a future either"- hence if the children who study at all stages of school are not encouraged by their history teachers to try to obtain observation and notions from the people of past, their progress in life are not expected to be as thriving as the ones who do. Furthermore when a person is not interested in history at school and travels overseas, how can this person introduce themselves as a patriotic individual? They are incapable of talking about anything that their country and nation went through. The future is written in the past and knowledge about the past can encourage us to make a better future. How can we understand the casualty or was if we do not look back at the major wars from history? To sum up, history belongs to the community itself and therefore it is people's duty to transmit it to the next generation. And as a result, by the help of the deductions from the predecessor's experiences and insights beneficiaries will be able to live uneventful and relaxed.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
state that studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
values in the modern life while others have an opposite view on this. In my opinion, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
purpose of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
lessons in schools is to educate students what the world was in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
and how to build a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
from the lessons the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
us. By studying and observing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, students can learn from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
generations and their experiments, mistakes, success, dedication, lifestyle, struggling and bravery can teach us to be ready for the hardships of life beforehand.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
has always comprised of invaluable insights of great kings, thinkers and warriors like Napoleon, Nietzsche and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aschille
. Examples taken from their words and actions are great source for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are passionate about acquiring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and clues of how to survive and thrive.
Moreover
, as my country's former president
Possible spelling mistake found.
Haydar
A. said
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
the one
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who
do not know their
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past
do not have a
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future
either
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
-
hence
if the children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
study at all stages of school are not encouraged by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
teachers to try to obtain observation and notions from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of
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past
, their progress in life are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to be as thriving as the ones
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who
do.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
when a person is not interested in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
at school and travels overseas, how can this person introduce themselves as a patriotic individual? They are incapable of talking about anything that their country and nation went through. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
is written
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
and knowledge about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
can encourage us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. How can we understand the casualty or was if we do not look back at the major wars from history?

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
belongs to the community itself and
therefore
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's duty to transmit it to the
next
generation. And
as a result
, by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of the deductions from the predecessor's experiences and insights beneficiaries will be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
uneventful and relaxed.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
Learn a new language and get a new soul.
Czech Proverb

IELTS essay To some people studying the past has little value in the modern world. Why do you think it is important to learn the past? What will be the effect if children are not taught history? v. 5

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
336 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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