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To solve the ever-increasing environmental hazards throughout the world, the best way is to increase the price of fuel. v.2

To solve the ever-increasing environmental hazards throughout the world, the best way is to increase the price of fuel. v. 2
It is true that skyrocketing the fuel price can make a nosedive on the use of vehicles in many cities, but curtailing the volume of energy we utilise is not an elixir as it would soar the daily living expense as well. Hence, the human being ought to scout out renewable energy in an attempt to halt the tide of environment upheaval. To begin with, protecting the environment only through the buoyant price of energy sounds somewhat over-optimistic. Developing other environment-friendly forms of momentum, such as hydrogen, which is the most potent weapon to deal with this murky water is a far better solution. Despite the exorbitant price of fossil fuel, there is still a kaleidoscope of transportation that will need it. And by extension, airplane would be a concrete example- although the usage of these kinds of gigantic transportations is bound to dwindle, it is undeniable that they still emit a sheer amount of carbon dioxide. Therefore, diving deeply into the domain of substitute energy can be served as a luminary that close Pandora’s Box. Besides the renewable energy and the colossal fuel price, rearing a myriad of flora can usher in a great preponderance. What renders an easy access to oxygen is the vegetation which would absorb carbon dioxide – the most malignant element to our environment. In this dimension, revive the biodiversity seems as important as importance can be. Shielding the rainforest from deforestation and planting a broad spectrum of trees that spanning from alpines to bush on the major boulevards can truly breathe life into the urban sprawl. Most importantly, it could thoroughly eradicate the environment ailments. With all that, it is reasonable to extrapolate that spurting the fuel prices can be described as a blunt instrument. Nevertheless, impeding a wide range of anthropogenic activities and cementing the cornerstone of ecosystem might be much more possible and practical to tackle with this elusive enigma.
It is true that skyrocketing the
fuel
price
can
make
a nosedive on the
use
of vehicles in
many
cities,
but
curtailing the volume of
energy
we
utilise
is not an elixir as it would soar the daily living expense
as well
.
Hence
, the human being ought to scout out renewable
energy
in an attempt to halt the tide of
environment
upheaval.

To
begin
with, protecting the
environment
only
through the buoyant
price
of
energy
sounds somewhat over-optimistic. Developing other environment-friendly forms of momentum, such as hydrogen, which is the most potent weapon to deal with this murky water is a far better solution. Despite the exorbitant
price
of fossil
fuel
, there is
still
a kaleidoscope of transportation that will need it. And by extension, airplane would be a concrete example- although the usage of these kinds of gigantic transportations
is bound
to dwindle, it is undeniable that they
still
emit a sheer amount of carbon dioxide.
Therefore
, diving
deeply
into the domain of substitute
energy
can
be served
as a luminary that close Pandora’s Box.

Besides
the renewable
energy
and the colossal
fuel
price
, rearing a myriad of flora can usher in a great preponderance. What renders
an easy access
to oxygen is the vegetation which would absorb carbon dioxide
the most malignant element to our
environment
. In this dimension, revive the biodiversity seems as
important
as importance can be. Shielding the rainforest from deforestation and planting a broad spectrum of trees that spanning from alpines to bush on the major boulevards can
truly
breathe life into the urban sprawl. Most
importantly
, it could
thoroughly
eradicate the
environment
ailments.

With all that, it is reasonable to extrapolate that spurting the
fuel
prices
can be
described
as a blunt instrument.
Nevertheless
, impeding a wide range of anthropogenic activities and cementing the cornerstone of ecosystem might be much more possible and practical to tackle with this elusive enigma.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay To solve the ever-increasing environmental hazards throughout the world, the best way is to increase the price of fuel. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
318 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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