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These days many families move to other countries for work. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this move. However, others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.5

These days many families move to other countries for work. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this move. However, others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. v. 5
In this world dominated by technologies, working abroad is becoming everybody's dream. As part of migration to other countries for work, family of the primary worker also has to move along. While, some think that it makes life more difficult for the children. I personally think that children in these families benefit from this move. This essay will discuss this scenario, by considering the opinion of both sides by using the examples of Oxford university research and Time magazine survey to demonstrate the points and support the claims. On the one hand, some people, especially grandparents, think that migration hardens the path of kids, particularly toddlers. Furthermore, they concur with this opinion considering the fact that young children will lose their moral support, if they shift in young age. For example, Oxford university in 2015 researched that adults, particularly older people plays a vital role in the social improvement of the kids back home. So from this example, it is clear that parents alone can't make them a good candidate for tomorrow's world. On the other hand, some people contradict this thinking, by saying that, children get to socialize with new people. Additionally, they have the tendency to adapt to new culture with ease and in short duration, they get a good chance to explore new countries in their early age. Similarly, a survey of Time magazine in 2018 revealed that more than 90% of children comforts with this move. So, from this example, it is clear that young children customize themselves to new environments and are trouble free. To conclude, migration to new countries or continents improves the ability and confidence level of young kids. Moreover, they can adjust well with the society and well beings, will get a wide option to gain new knowledge and socialize with people of different discrimination. Finally, they will be ready to compete in this world.
In this world dominated by technologies, working abroad is becoming everybody's dream. As part of migration to other countries for work, family of the primary worker
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
along. While,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life more difficult for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in these families benefit from this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
. This essay will discuss this scenario, by considering the opinion of both sides by using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
examples
of Oxford university research and Time magazine survey to demonstrate the points and support the claims.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
grandparents,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that migration hardens the path of kids,
particularly
toddlers.
Furthermore
, they concur with this opinion considering the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will lose their moral support, if they shift in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
age. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, Oxford university in 2015 researched that adults,
The extreme adjective for old is "ancient".
particularly older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
plays
a vital role in the social improvement of the kids back home.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
from this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that parents alone can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
candidate for tomorrow's world.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
contradict this thinking, by saying that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to socialize with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Additionally
, they have the tendency to adapt to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
culture with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
and in short duration, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
chance to explore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
countries in their early age.
Similarly
, a survey of Time magazine in 2018 revealed that more than 90% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
comforts with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, from this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
customize themselves to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
environments and are trouble free.

To conclude
, migration to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
countries or continents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the ability and confidence level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
kids.
Moreover
, they can adjust well with the society and well beings, will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a wide option to gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
knowledge and socialize with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
discrimination.
Finally
, they will be ready to compete in this world.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes
We should learn languages because language is the only thing worth knowing even poorly.
Kató Lomb

IELTS essay These days many families move to other countries for work. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this move. However, others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
313 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 9.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 9.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 9.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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