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There are serious concerns about the sale and production of genetically modified food. Yet this is necessary if we are to meet the demands of an increasing world population. Give your opinions on this. v.2

There are serious concerns about the sale and production of genetically modified food. Yet this is necessary if we are to meet the demands of an increasing world population. Give your opinions on this. v. 2
It is widely believed that people do not welcome genetically modified food generally, but in the other side world population is increasing rapidly and this is a very big problem with food resources. I am convinced that we can produce food more efficiently in the future to accomplish the demands. Firstly, people claimed that genetically modified food is not natural and this is a deviation from traditional production. The lack of trust is the major problem for those who are convinced that this is the future. Masses do not approach well any scientific experiment in the genetic field. I believe there is no evidence to support that genetically modified food is healthy as produced normally produced with out modification. On the other hand, scientists have given good reasons that this is secure and has not bad derivation from traditional standards. Despite general contradicting factors that are involved in this issue, population is increasing in large scale and need for food too. Fast production in the same amount area is the solution for this case. It certainly true that land planted is decreasing because of expanded city areas and we need to think what might happen in near future. In conclusion, GM food may minimize the problem and provide the requirements for standard production, but the general opinion matters and it is still possible to maximize effectively planted land.
It is
widely
believed that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not welcome
genetically
modified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
generally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the other side world population is increasing
rapidly
and this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
resources. I
am convinced
that we can produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
more
efficiently
in the future to accomplish the demands.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
claimed that
genetically
modified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is not natural and this is a deviation from traditional production. The lack of trust is the major problem for those who
are convinced
that this is the future. Masses do not approach well any scientific experiment in the genetic field.

I believe there is no evidence to support that
genetically
modified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is healthy as produced
normally
produced
This word is usually written together. Did you mean "without"?
with out
modification.
On the other hand
, scientists have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reasons that this is secure and has not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
derivation from traditional standards.

Despite general contradicting factors that
are involved
in this issue, population is increasing in large scale and need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
too.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
production in the same amount area is the solution for this case. It
certainly
true that land planted is decreasing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of expanded city
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
areas and
we need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
what might happen in near future.

In conclusion
, GM
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
may minimize the problem and provide the requirements for standard production,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the general opinion matters and it is
still
possible to maximize
effectively
planted land.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay There are serious concerns about the sale and production of genetically modified food. Yet this is necessary if we are to meet the demands of an increasing world population. Give your opinions on this. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
228 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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