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Independent TOEFL essay -TPO 16: A/D? The best way to travel is in a group led by a tour guide. v.2

Independent TOEFL essay -TPO 16: A/D? The best way to travel is in a group led by a tour guide. v. 2
People travel to see new places and learn new things. In my vantage point, it is worth to go somewhere with a group led by a tour guide. Although you may wait for other group members, the guided tour has specific advantages. In the following paragraphs, I will elaborate on my viewpoint for travelling in a group with a leader. A tour guide knows everything about the destination. This means that you do not need to study or do anything to obtain the information about the place. Additionally, if you travel abroad, you can trust on the leader and do not need to learn a new language. For example, my friend is a tour guide in Turkey. She related the story of a tourist who bought a souvenir for his daughter but the salesman told the price higher than it was. As my friend had seen the price printed in the native language on the object, she interfered and hindered the traveler to pay the high cost. Travelling in a group that has a leader costs less than travelling alone due to some reasons. First, the leader knows where to spend your money to stay, to eat, to purchase, and to visit. Most guides have contracts with hotels, know the hotel managers, transportation companies' managers, and the like, and can get discount for services. Furthermore, there is a rule in economics that the more the number of the customers is, the less the expenses would be. As there are many people travelling together in a group trip, the costs will be reduced. When you travel alone, you have to spend some time on finding the places on the map and go to the destination. However, the guide knows the addresses and this will save some time for the traveler to visit more places. Additionally, the guides have the schedule which organizes your plan. Therefore, a guide leads you to stop by the more places to visit. To wrap it up, group trips with a leader is the best way to travel. In fact, the leader will help you in the destination in many aspects like language, the expenses will be decreased, the time will be saved, and you can visit more sites.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
and learn new things. In my vantage point, it is worth to go somewhere with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
led by a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
. Although you may wait for other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
members, the guided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
has specific advantages. In the following paragraphs, I will elaborate on my viewpoint for travelling in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
with a leader.

A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knows
everything about the destination. This means that you do not need to study or do anything to obtain the information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
.
Additionally
, if you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
abroad, you can trust on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
and do not need to learn a new language.
For example
, my friend is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
in Turkey. She related the story of a tourist who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
a souvenir for his daughter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the salesman
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
the price higher than it was. As my friend had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the price printed in the native language on the object, she interfered and hindered the traveler to pay the high cost.

Travelling in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
that has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
costs less than travelling alone due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons.
First
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knows
where to spend your money to stay, to eat, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
, and to visit. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guides
have contracts with hotels,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
the hotel managers, transportation
Possible spelling mistake found.
companies&
#039; managers, and the like, and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
discount for services.
Furthermore
, there is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
in economics that the more the number of the customers is, the less the expenses would be. As there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
travelling together in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
trip, the costs will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.

When you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
alone, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time on finding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
on the map and go to the destination.
However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knows
the addresses and this will save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time for the traveler to visit more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Additionally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guides
have the schedule which organizes your plan.
Therefore
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guide
leads you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
by the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
to visit.

To wrap it up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
trips with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
is the best way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
. In fact, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you in the destination in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects like language, the expenses will
be decreased
, the time will
be saved
, and you can visit more sites.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Independent TOEFL essay -TPO 16: A/D? The best way to travel is in a group led by a tour guide. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
372 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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