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There are many people who go to live in different countries. To what extent should people be allowed to move freely between countries and live where they choose? What are the benefits and drawbacks of this? v.1

There are many people who go to live in different countries. What are the benefits and drawbacks of this? v. 1
Travelling to different countries might open up opportunities for both travellers and country. In my opinion, travelling between countries should be allowed with at utmost care. I would like to discuss both benefits and drawbacks in this essay. To begin with, countries should open opportunity for people who like to immigrate and live in the country. This is because people might be interested in multiple opportunities offered, such as jobs or businesses to build their career path. For instance, citizens' of developing countries like India are moving to developed countries like Canada or the USA for better quality of lifestyle and opportunities. In addition to that, some people require to migrate because of the economic or political problems within the country. For example, people of Syria need to move out of the country as a refugee due to war. On the other hand, huge number of migrants might cause a huge lose for the country. People who are highly skilled are require to fill jobs within the country might cause a huge impact on both economy and stability. To illustrate, doctors from Africa started to migrate as a refugee causing insufficient help to local people. Furthermore, people who immigrate should be thoroughly inspected as some people might be a threat to the nation, as they might involve in terrorism or other illicit activities. For instance, the USA immigration has strict rules imposed after the 9/11 terror attack causing hundreds of deaths. In conclusion, the government authorities of different countries should impose proper rules and regulations for immigration keeping the security of the nation in mind.
Travelling to
different
countries
might
open up
opportunities
for both
travellers
and
country
. In my opinion, travelling between
countries
should be
allowed
with at utmost care. I would like to discuss both benefits and drawbacks in this essay.

To
begin
with,
countries
should open
opportunity
for
people
who like to immigrate and
live
in the
country
. This is
because
people
might
be interested
in multiple
opportunities
offered, such as jobs or businesses to build their career path.
For instance
, citizens' of developing
countries
like India are moving to developed
countries
like Canada or the USA for better quality of lifestyle and
opportunities
.
In addition
to that,
some
people
require
to migrate
because
of the economic or political problems within the
country
.
For example
,
people
of Syria need to
move
out of the
country
as a refugee due to war.

On the other hand
, huge number of migrants
might
cause a huge lose for the
country
.
People
who are
highly
skilled are
require
to fill
jobs within the
country
might
cause a huge impact on both economy and stability. To illustrate, doctors from Africa
started
to migrate as a refugee causing insufficient
help
to local
people
.
Furthermore
,
people
who immigrate should be
thoroughly
inspected as
some
people
might
be a threat to the nation, as they
might
involve in terrorism or other illicit activities.
For instance
, the USA immigration has strict
rules
imposed after the 9/11 terror attack causing hundreds of deaths.

In conclusion
, the
government
authorities of
different
countries
should impose proper
rules
and regulations for immigration keeping the security of the nation in mind.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay There are many people who go to live in different countries. What are the benefits and drawbacks of this? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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