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The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for the poor in undeveloped countries but also for industrialised and developing nations. v.5

The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for the poor in undeveloped countries but also for industrialised and developing nations. v. 5
For the past few decades, planet earth is observing a significant rise in world population which is very alarming. Substantial increase in population is also causing problems in growing countries. This essay will explain some of the problems caused by overpopulation and will recommend few possible remedies to overcome this issue. The very first problem caused by overpopulation is in providing basic necessities of life to inhabitants. Governments find it very hard to provide adequate food and water to residents, provide quality educational services and faces problems in facilitating proper health services both in urban and rural areas. For instance, in India, more than 70% people lives below the poverty line. Moreover, overpopulation destroys the ecosystem of the society. Another cause due to the increase in population is that governments and administrators of the emergent countries fail to arrange proper public services. This includes logistics, mass transit system, power generation and arranging housing facilities for people in overcrowded cities. For instance, people in Pakistan are facing crisis in the energy sector and public transport system due to overpopulation. This also gives rise to unemployment which results in increased crime rate. There are few remedies to over this acute problem. One of them is through having awareness programs for families to control birth rate. For instance, family health workers in Sindh created a huge impact in rural areas by educating families about the issues caused by overpopulation. Government should also put in place strong policies and high tax rate on families having more than two children To conclude, overpopulation causes problem in health, academic and other public services domain and place a huge burden on the government. If the problem continues to grow without having proper control of it, many more people will die due to starvation in poor countries and life in growing countries will become increasingly difficult.
For the past few decades, planet earth is observing a significant rise in world population which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
alarming. Substantial increase in population is
also
causing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
and will recommend few possible remedies to overcome this issue.

The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
is in providing
Consider using "necessities".
basic necessities
of life to inhabitants.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
find it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to provide adequate food and water to residents, provide quality educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
and faces
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in facilitating proper health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
both in urban and rural areas.
For instance
, in India, more than 70%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
lives
below the poverty line.
Moreover
,
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overpopulation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroys
the ecosystem of the society.

Another cause due to the increase in population is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
and administrators of the emergent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
fail to arrange proper public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
. This includes logistics, mass transit system, power generation and arranging housing facilities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in overcrowded cities.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in Pakistan are facing crisis in the energy sector and public transport system due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
. This
also
gives rise to unemployment which results in increased crime rate.

There are few remedies to over this acute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. One of them is through having awareness programs for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
to control birth rate.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
health workers in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sindh
created a huge impact in rural areas by educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
about the issues caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should
also
put in place strong policies and high tax rate on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
having more than two
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
children


To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
causes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in health, academic and other public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
domain and place a huge burden on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
continues to grow without having proper control of it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
due to starvation in poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and life in growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will become
increasingly
difficult.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for the poor in undeveloped countries but also for industrialised and developing nations. v. 5

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
308 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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